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#399
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[19:34:01] <Arjuna> Genital jousting is on sale, and my grandma gave me a card for christmas with steam wallet money
[19:34:12] <Arjuna> I... think she just bought me this game....
#407
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[19:18:02] <Loki> home is where you fully understand how the shower works
[19:20:54] <Kez> home is where everyone vacates because you don't properly shower and bathe yourself
[19:21:17] <Loki> That's most rooms, isn't it? Or do I just live everywhere
[19:22:03] <Kez> You may be homeless.
#169
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[16:24:13] <minty_sadness> this is bullshit
[16:24:37] <minty_sadness> if you can't launch bottle rockets from someone's anus then what's the fucking point of pledging to a fraternity?
#430
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[16:53:26] <selatos> this isn't like sex
[16:53:34] <selatos> the faster you finish the more you can do it
[16:53:48] <Loki> how is that not like sex
[16:54:18] <selatos> everyone is happier when sex is not the shortest possible
[16:54:27] <Loki> but you can still do it more the faster you finish!
[16:54:29] <Loki> its efficient
[16:54:32] <Loki> if your goal is as many sex as possible
[16:54:41] <Loki> the refractory period starts earlier, but it also ends earlier!
[16:54:52] <Loki> or as I like to call it, the global cooldown
[16:54:53] <selatos> but then your girl gets annoyed and leaves
[16:55:04] <selatos> so total time spent sexing is shorter
[16:55:05] <Loki> that just means you didnt secure the handcuffs well enough
#212
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<blackhole> good. cat's back, i can poop again
<Squall_Chitose> was he hogging the litter box?
#23
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[17:17:48] <Adam_Zad> "While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad."
#50
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[15:41:32] <Thirteen> well, I skipped my chemical romance
[15:42:42] <Jenos> Skipping's for girls or boxers. Are you a girl or a boxer?
[15:42:57] <Mikel> I wear boxers, does that count?
[15:43:01] <Light> Only if you're a girl.
[15:43:06] <Thirteen> I dated a girl boxer once
[15:43:13] <Light> Like, a female dog?
[15:43:23] <Thirteen> no, like a human female that boxes
[15:43:34] <Jenos> worked in a warehouse?
#80
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[11:14] <@Dac_Kain> I paid for a bribe once, 7 days later I got a mail order russian lady at my door. Boy do I need glasses
#89
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[14:53:00] <Cherokee> i bit myself in a retarded way now there is a piece of meat hanging from my mouth
#97
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[16:15:10] <Quetzalxochitl> 17. The idea of verbally dominating/humiliating (name calling, dictating orders, etc.) during sexual activity is exciting to me
[16:15:31] <Quetzalxochitl> sure, but I always hit a writer's block after the first "you like it, slut"
[16:16:10] <Quetzalxochitl> GIMME ALL YO YENS YIP YIP YAP
#6
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[17:32:25] <Jerev> Million Man March!
[17:32:33] * Nalah (Nalah@SWC-IRC.454356B93E278.SWC) Quit (Ping timeout)
[17:33:37] <Jerev> How come everytime I say something, someone leaves?
[17:34:08] * Ed|uni (~Ed@SWC-IRC.AFDE1B3B8D90.SWC) Quit (Quit: ~ <RobertDerr> Az, I'm going to try to dock in you | Can't beat a good whack :P ~)
[17:36:47] <Jerev> Owned!
[17:36:55] * Cherokee (~tcherokee@SWC-IRC.BE173B7E3EF991.SWC) Quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
[17:37:01] <Jerev> Dammit!!
#98
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[05:02:41] <blackhole> why do i know how to spell cthulhu and not jirafee?
#190
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[10:39:33] <Luke_Whitelock> you said park not me
[10:39:40] <Loki> If I can drive 2 hours you can walk 10 minutes.
[10:40:16] <Luke_Whitelock> I can't go into town that why I said here
[10:40:33] <Loki> ..Why not?
[10:40:39] <Squall_Chitose> Your mommy won't let you leave?
[10:40:40] <Varlathotep> Because his family that surprised him is there!
[10:40:44] <Varlathotep> Pay attention Loki!
[10:40:47] <Ten> gps anklet tracker
[10:40:48] <Luke_Whitelock> last time I did I was close to being hit by a truck
[10:40:53] <Ten> ...
[10:40:56] <Loki> hahah
[10:41:10] <Ten> and there was a black cat
[10:41:15] <Ten> and it rained
[10:41:32] <Luke_Whitelock> they were on the side walk
[10:41:40] <Loki> oh no now you can never go on the sidewalk again
[10:42:06] <Luke_Whitelock> yes so I can't go into town
[10:42:11] <Loki> not ever again
[10:42:14] <Loki> you're stuck inside forever
[10:42:23] <Luke_Whitelock> yes
[10:42:26] <Ten> he can go in the yard
[10:42:28] <Ten> no trucks there
[10:42:32] <Varlathotep> You never know.
[10:42:38] <Varlathotep> Those fire engines are wild man.
[10:42:52] <Loki> man its a good thing you live in the middle of nowhere so you can hide from all of the scary things in the world like people and cars and sunlight
[10:43:04] <Loki> and very small rocks
[10:47:11] <Luke_Whitelock> just because you like to be hit by cars don't mean I want to
[10:47:32] <Loki> I have eyes, so like, usually I look at the street to make sure I'm not stepping in front of one
[10:47:35] <Loki> maybe you should try that
[10:47:51] <Loki> life advice right here, cars are not ants, you can actually see them coming
[10:48:10] <Luke_Whitelock> I don't walk on the road loki
[10:48:16] <Loki> You dont walk at all from the sounds of it
[10:48:22] <Squall_Chitose> Dude, even chickens cross the road.
#33
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[15:34:12] <Keir> The most trusted name in violence is now the most trusted name in banking! Eidola investments offers you a guaranteed 400% profit on your investments through one of our dedicated branch managers. Speak to us today, to ensure a brighter future!
[15:34:34] <Cesodevo> ...
[15:34:56] * Keir is now known as Person_in_Crowd
[15:35:01] <Person_in_Crowd> "Hey, these guys look legit!"
#295
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[17:09:55] <Keth> So you're saying that there are currently no laws in elysia?
[17:10:24] <Loki|Arrow> well it's called elysia for a reason, of course there are no laws
[17:10:36] <Dagaro> But it has a King?
[17:10:43] <Loki|Arrow> i didn't vote for him
[17:11:01] <Dagaro> He was chosen by the Lady of the Maw
[17:11:27] <Rev[a]n> Some fancy tart throwing swords out a blackhole is no basis for a government
#337
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[13:25:42] <Altair> and grammatically its good nuff?
[13:25:55] <@Ten> depends on what you consider good enough
[13:26:26] <Altair> I spelled enough as nuff.
#123
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<Jevon> You kno\, uyjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj4444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWS
<Jevon> tHE CAT SAYS HI, APPARENTLY
<Cait> o.O
#124
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[04:15:29] <dot> Captcha read "How are you" and I typed good >_<
#129
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[10:46:31] <Selatos> D: doctor's office was uncomfortable, but productive i suppose
[10:48:06] <Selatos> two words: prostate exam
[10:48:16] <Selatos> maybe three, surprise prostate exam
#30
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[15:43:05] <Laz|away> and by the way, what prompted this war in the first place?
[15:44:43] <Keir> Frezt's refusal to sign a treaty and grant Eidola one planet in Kathol space
[15:45:23] <Laz|away> and what did you need a planet in Kathol space for?
[15:45:57] <Keir> raising tauntauns
[15:46:57] <Laz|away> wouldn't one normally do that on Hoth.....in Churba?
[15:47:33] <Keir> We capture them in Hoth, and raise them in Kathol
[15:47:41] <Laz|away> and what happened to that story of a bridge between your territories?
[15:47:53] <Keir> lies concocted by our enemies to discredit us
[15:47:59] <Keir> we are simple tauntaun farmers
#93
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[17:10:51] <Crog> now make sound when you pooping , like TATATATATATa
#95
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[07:56] <&Zhao> Morning Vey
[07:59] <&Jesfa> , the australian said aloud.
[08:03] <&Zhao> ...stop narrating my life!
[08:04] <&Jesfa> , he mumbled angrily under his breath.
[08:05] <&Zhao> .......
[08:05] <&Jesfa> The australian, so stupid as he was, was incapable of forming words.
#385
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[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Typical Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Jedi
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Not Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Accidental racism my bad
#132
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[22:53:42] <Cherokee> if i had a dollar for every time someone called me ugly , id be broke because im perfect, lol later losers
[22:53:45] * Cherokee (tcherokee77@HULK) has left #swc-members
#226
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[16:11:12] <Chermobyl> Don't spray like an anal.
[16:11:13] <Chermobyl> ...
[16:11:13] <Selatos> you're basically a nighttime prowler though
[16:11:15] <Chermobyl> Animal
[16:11:19] <blackhole> haha
[16:11:23] <Minty_Cream> don't spray like an anal either though
[16:11:33] <blackhole> please, spray like an anal
[16:12:09] <Loki-> Fuck you all for making me laugh in a dead silent room filled with people
[16:12:09] <Chermobyl> You can't handle the poop
[16:12:09] <blackhole> hahaha
[16:12:24] <Clark_Kent> Hahaha
[16:12:49] <Minty_Cream> keep us updated as the situation develops
#10
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[19:02:00] <Keir|MST3K> Squall
[19:02:13] <Squall_Chitose> yes?
[19:02:26] <Keir|MST3K> If you get shot in Iraq, promise me you'll scream either "Fucking camping bitch!" or "omg, he rolled a natural 20!" ?
#61
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[01:35:22] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) has joined #swc-members
[01:35:45] <Cherokee> No.
[01:35:47] <Cherokee> Get out.
[01:38:17] * Rick_Unnis (Rick_Unnis@SWC-IRC.28D46D33E3A7E2.SWC) Quit (Quit: )
[01:38:46] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) Quit (Quit: * Goran_Skirata is now away - Reason : Squall has an unhealthy and disconcerting interest in me)
[01:40:28] * Vussek_Kaos (~vussek@SWC-IRC.E4B5D168BCDB9.SWC) Quit (Quit: <.Gavin> somewhere there is a 1 armed man who is beatin off with one hand, and using his nose to type and surf the sites)
[01:40:35] * Geno (~Geno@SWC-IRC.635C21F8A454C.SWC) Quit (Ping timeout)
[01:41:06] <Cherokee> I didn't mean all of them, just Squall.
#91
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[14:16:05] <Panda_Prime> We only converse breifly and in short bursts! That's not knowing someone!
[14:16:36] <Ten> that's the internet equivalent of having shared a bed!
#112
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[07:28:49] <Cherokee> ARE YOUR LEGS STILL TIRED SYN
[07:29:07] <Italian_Stallion_Loki> OH MY YES
[07:29:14] <Cherokee> WHY YOU YELLING
[07:29:18] <Italian_Stallion_Loki> YOU STARTED IT
[07:29:34] <Cherokee> YES BECAUSE YOU HAVE BAD INTERNET CONNECTION , WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU HEAR ME
#370
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[19:06:04] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:06] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:14] <ETJ> We did it out of order.
[19:06:15] <ETJ> Try again.
[19:06:17] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:25] <Loki> yeah but they go bad so quickly
[19:06:38] <ETJ> You're out of phase.
[19:06:40] <Loki> oops
[19:06:42] <ETJ> Your time machine broke
[19:06:45] <ETJ> Lets do this again
[19:06:47] <Loki> write that down for a few days from now
[19:06:47] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:51] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:55] <ETJ> Damn.
#3
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[15:38:27] <Nalah> My mother marks the English national exams. She was marking one creative writing paper today, and she got to the bottom of the page of one that read "the doctor knelt down beside her and raped her" - she turned the page and it finished "leg in a bandage". Hehe.
#289
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[08:23:48] <Deric_Adams> wtf are you reading?
[08:24:04] <@Superman> nothing go away
[08:24:10] <Deric_Adams> guys, erek is reading 50 shades of grey
[08:24:17] <Deric_Adams> lets all laugh and point at him
[08:24:41] <@Superman> 50 Shades of Grey is a book not a series
[08:24:44] <@Superman> I think
[08:24:46] <@Superman> To google!
[08:24:48] <Deric_Adams> wrong
[08:24:53] <Deric_Adams> there is like 3 books
[08:25:10] <@Superman> ew
[08:25:17] <@Superman> there are three-...
[08:25:24] <@Superman> How'd you know that...
[08:26:06] <Deric_Adams> I um
[08:26:08] <Deric_Adams> uhh
[08:26:13] <Deric_Adams> gotta go!
[08:26:15] * Quits: Deric_Adams (Deric_Adam@swc-irc.cp2.4m6.k0aau8.IP) (Quit: <DA->I saw Srota today, suicide sounds very good right now)
#46
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[13:49:01] <£> Humph.
[13:49:08] <£> I was expecting a picture of your nipple.
[13:49:13] <£> You disappoint me.
[13:49:15] <Ayatollah_Khomo> Do you want one?
[13:49:20] <Mikel> I have one
[13:49:21] <Ayatollah_Khomo> I have one somewhere
[13:49:32] <£> You should have two.
[13:49:39] <£> And the location is pretty standard across all models.
#350
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<@Thirteen> what about dre?
<Kilian_Delmarco> People act like they forgot about dre.
<PRE_Kynnovan> Who is Dre?
<@Thirteen> motherfucker, acting like you forgot about dre
<Kilian_Delmarco> Shame.
<@Thirteen> he's still the same OG, he's just been low key!
<PRE_Kynnovan> Well, in my defense I've only been around for 10 months
#111
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[22:54:21] * Wool (soan@swc-irc.7rf.nm9.rjksk9.IP) has joined #anime
[22:54:25] * Cherokee (tcherokee77@swc-irc.00v.p8l.ulteai.IP) has joined #anime
[22:54:26] <Cherokee> WOOL
[22:54:28] <Wool> CHEROKEE
[22:54:29] <Cherokee> WOOL
[22:54:31] <Wool> CHEROKEE
[22:54:33] <Cherokee> WOOL WOOL WOOL WOOL WOOL
[22:54:35] <Wool> CHEROKEE CHEROKEE CHEROKEE CHEROKEE CHEROKEE
[22:54:37] <Cherokee> DO THE WOOLY BULLY
[22:54:38] <Cherokee> DO IT
[22:54:39] * Wool DOES IT
[22:54:40] <Cherokee> YATAA
[22:54:42] * Cherokee (tcherokee77@swc-irc.00v.p8l.ulteai.IP) has left #anime
[22:54:45] <Wool> big success
[22:54:54] <Wool> back to work
[22:54:59] * Wool (soan@swc-irc.7rf.nm9.rjksk9.IP) has left #anime
[22:55:54] <Kilian> o_o
#131
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[23:12:12] <Selatos> var why are you being emo
[23:12:35] <Varfarius> I've got the heart break blues selatos. Sadly, it's not from my girlfriend.
[23:12:53] <Varfarius> Is it bad I feel more betrayed by a server than my own girlfriend when she won't put out?!
[23:13:24] <Selatos> if your server isn't putting out, i feel bad for you son, i got 99 problems, but a misconfig ain't one
#150
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<|||Ashlyana|||> In California you can always find a party, in Soviet Russia, party can always find you.
#410
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<@Loki-cell> She only plays AI mode in heroes of the storm so she's not worth my time
#423
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[22:58:39] <Dalovan_Lombardo> How was the race Blackhole?
[22:59:03] <blackhole> i finished it and didn't end the 8000th so that's great
[22:59:22] <Dalovan_Lombardo> Good good
[23:00:03] <blackhole> and how are you? tell me about yourself
[23:00:06] * blackhole (blackhole@swc-irc.7do.9pm.1cvv54.IP) Quit (Quit: <Loki> past. Help! My scientist friend showed me his time machine, which keeps sending me three seconds into the)
[23:01:43] * blackhole (blackhole@swc-irc.7do.9pm.1cvv54.IP) has joined #SWC-Members
[23:01:58] <Dalovan_Lombardo> Why do he keep leaving :-(
[23:02:49] <blackhole> it's called conceptual art
[23:03:23] <Dalovan_Lombardo> Hmm
[23:03:26] <Mora> It is called fatherhood
[23:03:28] <blackhole> also, this way, i never know if you are pregnant
#424
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<Loki> I put my pants on like anybody else: when I absolutely have to and not always then
#51
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[15:44:11] <Mikel> I wear boxer-briefs so you can see the outline of my massive package
[15:44:24] <Jenos> Mikel, you're a postman?
[15:44:25] <Thirteen> the spare socks?
[15:44:47] <Thirteen> it was a good idea, but really, four socks?
[15:44:50] <Mikel> The best 4 inches you've ever seen, baby
[15:45:02] <Mikel> I mean... more than that?
#69
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[18:06:49] <Cherokee> Today on Facebook, I found out that the girl I thought I had been dating for the past year was actually dating someone else that entire time.
[18:07:09] <Cherokee> I apparently misconstrued the 'xxx xxxxxx is now in a relationship' update last year.
#121
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(Kyle Rainer, who recently returned from a multi-year hiatus from SWC..)
[15:18:48] <Zhao> I feel like everyone should have me on colored in their address book
[15:18:54] <Zhao> Everything I say is super important
[15:20:03] * Kyle|Away is now known as Kyle
[15:20:22] <Kyle> somehow your ego has grown since I left
[15:20:37] <Jevon> Its had a long time to grow
[15:20:43] <Loki> I've been a good influence
[15:20:58] <Kyle> I mean in the like 40 minutes I was away
#166
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[18:04:47] <mikel> What is the difference between a woman and a man
[18:04:50] <mikel> er
[18:04:55] <mikel> What is the difference between a wombat and a man
[18:04:58] <Thor> ...
#288
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[19:36:37] <Brand> My dad gave me a birthday card that was signed 'Happy Birthday, please recycling this card, love pop'
[19:37:04] <Brand> So i crossed out Birthday and wrote 'x-mas' and crossed out Pop and wrote 'son'
#45
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[12:49:29] <Kevin> Man, weekends are pretty popular for piracy, huh?
[12:49:40] <Kevin> Demonoid and TPB seem to both be overloaded
[12:49:46] <Arthur> IC Piracy or bittorrent piracy?
[12:49:48] <Arthur> oh
[12:50:11] <Kevin> I think we all engage in some boat theft over the weekend, that's a given
#341
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[16:11:55] <Kilian> Lee Lee, Keth is our local night walker
[16:12:30] <Keth> bleh!
[16:12:34] * Keth avoids garlic
[16:12:49] <Kilian> no I meant male prostitue
[16:13:49] <Keth> bleh!
[16:13:54] * Keth avoids the popo
#114
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[18:37:11] <Eldrwyn_D`Auvergne> I can almost always tell if a movie doesn't use real dinosaurs
#372
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[16:39] <@Ten> https://cdn15.acloudimages.com/36d/f74/389/300x250_30.gif she just keeps typing D:
[16:41] <blackhole> she probably wants to propose you for sex but she is scared of being so direct
[16:42] <blackhole> ignore her. unsecure females are not too good in bed
[16:42] <blackhole> ..or insecure
[16:43] <@Ten> have you had much experience with insecure females in bed?
[16:43] <blackhole> i'm always the insecure female in bed
[16:44] * blackhole is typing...
[16:44] * blackhole is typing...
[16:44] * blackhole is typing...
[16:45] <blackhole> hi?
[16:45] * @Ten is typing...
[16:46] * blackhole is typing...
#405
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[19:11:55] * Superman considers outing Syn
[19:15:34] <selatos> as what
[19:15:56] <selatos> a vampire? a homosexual? a tortured teenage soul?
[19:16:07] <selatos> a falleen?
[19:23:04] <Superman> even worse
[19:23:11] <Superman> a german speaker

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