Worst

prev12345next

#50
up
13
down
[15:41:32] <Thirteen> well, I skipped my chemical romance
[15:42:42] <Jenos> Skipping's for girls or boxers. Are you a girl or a boxer?
[15:42:57] <Mikel> I wear boxers, does that count?
[15:43:01] <Light> Only if you're a girl.
[15:43:06] <Thirteen> I dated a girl boxer once
[15:43:13] <Light> Like, a female dog?
[15:43:23] <Thirteen> no, like a human female that boxes
[15:43:34] <Jenos> worked in a warehouse?
#77
up
13
down
[13:51] * Veynom is Sim Master.
[13:51] * ChanServ sets mode: +o Veynom
[13:52] <Veynom> Holy shit, 1616 emails, what did you do guys !!!
[13:53] <Kyle> um there is an email from orion you should look at Vey
[13:53] <Togan> it's hidden within those 1616 mails
#338
up
13
down
[22:23:12] <Carlisle> Hmm. My best man speech is clocking in at 5 minutes 10 seconds. I think I need to trim some of it.
[22:23:17] <Carlisle> Or speed up the delivery.
[22:31:58] <Twelve> just remove every single pause
[22:32:44] <Carlisle> But those are the spots I breathe.
[22:33:18] <Twelve> ugh
[22:33:27] <Twelve> just do it like they do in those high school debate teams
[22:33:34] <Twelve> just one hickup and done
[22:33:49] <Carlisle> What, be socially awkward and a minority?
[22:33:53] <Carlisle> oh
#128
up
13
down
[21:44:09] <Cherokee> james bond beat abraham lincoln at the box office
[21:44:22] <Cherokee> boy it was a bad week for republicans all around
--
[22:39:59] <Cherokee> steven speilberg's Lincoln is in theaters now
[22:40:06] <Cherokee> traditionally, not a good place for him
#415
up
13
down
[22:19:24] <Thresk> Guys
[22:19:26] <Thresk> Save ne
[22:19:27] <Thresk> Me
[22:20:07] <Thresk> Save me
[22:21:19] <Thresk> Guys make me feel better
[22:21:42] <Twelve> if guys make you feel better then you should just go find some guys..
#186
up
13
down
<DA> haha pornhub tweeted "Don't try and upload the superbowl game, we don't allow rape"
<Azarin> Ahahahaha
<@Superman> haha
<Squall_Chitose> I'm disturbed that you follow pornhub on twitter, Deric.
<Squall_Chitose> Disturbed, but not surprised.
#88
up
14
down
[00:11] <Asa> pretty sure my in character daddy is dead
[00:11] <@JohnnyFox> Luke thought the same thing.
#98
up
14
down
[05:02:41] <blackhole> why do i know how to spell cthulhu and not jirafee?
#407
up
14
down
[19:18:02] <Loki> home is where you fully understand how the shower works
[19:20:54] <Kez> home is where everyone vacates because you don't properly shower and bathe yourself
[19:21:17] <Loki> That's most rooms, isn't it? Or do I just live everywhere
[19:22:03] <Kez> You may be homeless.
#51
up
15
down
[15:44:11] <Mikel> I wear boxer-briefs so you can see the outline of my massive package
[15:44:24] <Jenos> Mikel, you're a postman?
[15:44:25] <Thirteen> the spare socks?
[15:44:47] <Thirteen> it was a good idea, but really, four socks?
[15:44:50] <Mikel> The best 4 inches you've ever seen, baby
[15:45:02] <Mikel> I mean... more than that?
#68
up
15
down
[03:15:03] <Ten> I just realized something strange
[03:15:19] <DvD> You DONT have a vachina?
[03:15:30] <Ten> I don't know what a vachina is
[03:15:37] <Ten> so, probably not that
[03:16:00] <Ten> no, I just woke up to the realization that I've been talking out loud to my computer in a transformers voice
[03:17:59] <Ten> where did everyone go?!
[03:18:38] <Light> I went to poop
[03:19:20] <dorothy> I was smoking
[03:19:35] <Ten> phew
[03:19:44] <Ten> for a moment it was like my fourth birthday all over again
[03:19:52] <dorothy> lol
[03:20:08] <DvD> lol
[03:20:42] <Ten> we were playing hide and seek, my family, class mates, house staff
[03:20:44] <Ten> I was it
[03:20:54] <Ten> when I finished counting to ten, everyone was gone
#382
up
15
down
[23:49:21] <Kivan_Hamner> Twas the night before Christmas and all throughout the house
[23:49:29] <Kivan_Hamner> the AC was blowing, cause I live in the South
#132
up
15
down
[22:53:42] <Cherokee> if i had a dollar for every time someone called me ugly , id be broke because im perfect, lol later losers
[22:53:45] * Cherokee (tcherokee77@HULK) has left #swc-members
#426
up
15
down
[01:20:24] <.selatos> so weird
[01:20:26] <.selatos> all of you
[01:20:45] <@Loki> NAME ONE TIME
[01:21:03] <@Loki> my arms feel like someone is blowing on them with their mouth open
#212
up
15
down
<blackhole> good. cat's back, i can poop again
<Squall_Chitose> was he hogging the litter box?
#45
up
16
down
[12:49:29] <Kevin> Man, weekends are pretty popular for piracy, huh?
[12:49:40] <Kevin> Demonoid and TPB seem to both be overloaded
[12:49:46] <Arthur> IC Piracy or bittorrent piracy?
[12:49:48] <Arthur> oh
[12:50:11] <Kevin> I think we all engage in some boat theft over the weekend, that's a given
#95
up
16
down
[07:56] <&Zhao> Morning Vey
[07:59] <&Jesfa> , the australian said aloud.
[08:03] <&Zhao> ...stop narrating my life!
[08:04] <&Jesfa> , he mumbled angrily under his breath.
[08:05] <&Zhao> .......
[08:05] <&Jesfa> The australian, so stupid as he was, was incapable of forming words.
#97
up
16
down
[16:15:10] <Quetzalxochitl> 17. The idea of verbally dominating/humiliating (name calling, dictating orders, etc.) during sexual activity is exciting to me
[16:15:31] <Quetzalxochitl> sure, but I always hit a writer's block after the first "you like it, slut"
[16:16:10] <Quetzalxochitl> GIMME ALL YO YENS YIP YIP YAP
#385
up
16
down
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Typical Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Jedi
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Not Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Accidental racism my bad
#55
up
17
down
[11:43:21] * Riad_Sertage (~chatzilla@SWC-IRC.113BB7FF48F335.SWC) has joined #Help
[11:45:35] <Riad_Sertage> I never see any chatting is this a coinsidence or do you have to do something special to view the chat?
[11:47:19] <Riad_Sertage> Wait, If I can't see the chat Ican't see your answers... crap
[11:48:57] * Riad_Sertage (~chatzilla@SWC-IRC.113BB7FF48F335.SWC) Quit (Quit: ChatZilla 0.9.85 [Firefox 3.5.2/20090729225027])
#80
up
17
down
[11:14] <@Dac_Kain> I paid for a bribe once, 7 days later I got a mail order russian lady at my door. Boy do I need glasses
#350
up
17
down
<@Thirteen> what about dre?
<Kilian_Delmarco> People act like they forgot about dre.
<PRE_Kynnovan> Who is Dre?
<@Thirteen> motherfucker, acting like you forgot about dre
<Kilian_Delmarco> Shame.
<@Thirteen> he's still the same OG, he's just been low key!
<PRE_Kynnovan> Well, in my defense I've only been around for 10 months
#129
up
17
down
[10:46:31] <Selatos> D: doctor's office was uncomfortable, but productive i suppose
[10:48:06] <Selatos> two words: prostate exam
[10:48:16] <Selatos> maybe three, surprise prostate exam
#190
up
17
down
[10:39:33] <Luke_Whitelock> you said park not me
[10:39:40] <Loki> If I can drive 2 hours you can walk 10 minutes.
[10:40:16] <Luke_Whitelock> I can't go into town that why I said here
[10:40:33] <Loki> ..Why not?
[10:40:39] <Squall_Chitose> Your mommy won't let you leave?
[10:40:40] <Varlathotep> Because his family that surprised him is there!
[10:40:44] <Varlathotep> Pay attention Loki!
[10:40:47] <Ten> gps anklet tracker
[10:40:48] <Luke_Whitelock> last time I did I was close to being hit by a truck
[10:40:53] <Ten> ...
[10:40:56] <Loki> hahah
[10:41:10] <Ten> and there was a black cat
[10:41:15] <Ten> and it rained
[10:41:32] <Luke_Whitelock> they were on the side walk
[10:41:40] <Loki> oh no now you can never go on the sidewalk again
[10:42:06] <Luke_Whitelock> yes so I can't go into town
[10:42:11] <Loki> not ever again
[10:42:14] <Loki> you're stuck inside forever
[10:42:23] <Luke_Whitelock> yes
[10:42:26] <Ten> he can go in the yard
[10:42:28] <Ten> no trucks there
[10:42:32] <Varlathotep> You never know.
[10:42:38] <Varlathotep> Those fire engines are wild man.
[10:42:52] <Loki> man its a good thing you live in the middle of nowhere so you can hide from all of the scary things in the world like people and cars and sunlight
[10:43:04] <Loki> and very small rocks
[10:47:11] <Luke_Whitelock> just because you like to be hit by cars don't mean I want to
[10:47:32] <Loki> I have eyes, so like, usually I look at the street to make sure I'm not stepping in front of one
[10:47:35] <Loki> maybe you should try that
[10:47:51] <Loki> life advice right here, cars are not ants, you can actually see them coming
[10:48:10] <Luke_Whitelock> I don't walk on the road loki
[10:48:16] <Loki> You dont walk at all from the sounds of it
[10:48:22] <Squall_Chitose> Dude, even chickens cross the road.
#10
up
18
down
[19:02:00] <Keir|MST3K> Squall
[19:02:13] <Squall_Chitose> yes?
[19:02:26] <Keir|MST3K> If you get shot in Iraq, promise me you'll scream either "Fucking camping bitch!" or "omg, he rolled a natural 20!" ?
#46
up
18
down
[13:49:01] <£> Humph.
[13:49:08] <£> I was expecting a picture of your nipple.
[13:49:13] <£> You disappoint me.
[13:49:15] <Ayatollah_Khomo> Do you want one?
[13:49:20] <Mikel> I have one
[13:49:21] <Ayatollah_Khomo> I have one somewhere
[13:49:32] <£> You should have two.
[13:49:39] <£> And the location is pretty standard across all models.
#61
up
18
down
[01:35:22] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) has joined #swc-members
[01:35:45] <Cherokee> No.
[01:35:47] <Cherokee> Get out.
[01:38:17] * Rick_Unnis (Rick_Unnis@SWC-IRC.28D46D33E3A7E2.SWC) Quit (Quit: )
[01:38:46] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) Quit (Quit: * Goran_Skirata is now away - Reason : Squall has an unhealthy and disconcerting interest in me)
[01:40:28] * Vussek_Kaos (~vussek@SWC-IRC.E4B5D168BCDB9.SWC) Quit (Quit: <.Gavin> somewhere there is a 1 armed man who is beatin off with one hand, and using his nose to type and surf the sites)
[01:40:35] * Geno (~Geno@SWC-IRC.635C21F8A454C.SWC) Quit (Ping timeout)
[01:41:06] <Cherokee> I didn't mean all of them, just Squall.
#63
up
18
down
[02:25:42] <Ten> The noise which my neighbours possibly mistook for a dog in the apartment is just the looping tape I have of dogs barking which I play at high volume while I am at work to deter potential burglars from breaking in and stealing my tupperware.
#89
up
18
down
[14:53:00] <Cherokee> i bit myself in a retarded way now there is a piece of meat hanging from my mouth
#169
up
18
down
[16:24:13] <minty_sadness> this is bullshit
[16:24:37] <minty_sadness> if you can't launch bottle rockets from someone's anus then what's the fucking point of pledging to a fraternity?
#226
up
18
down
[16:11:12] <Chermobyl> Don't spray like an anal.
[16:11:13] <Chermobyl> ...
[16:11:13] <Selatos> you're basically a nighttime prowler though
[16:11:15] <Chermobyl> Animal
[16:11:19] <blackhole> haha
[16:11:23] <Minty_Cream> don't spray like an anal either though
[16:11:33] <blackhole> please, spray like an anal
[16:12:09] <Loki-> Fuck you all for making me laugh in a dead silent room filled with people
[16:12:09] <Chermobyl> You can't handle the poop
[16:12:09] <blackhole> hahaha
[16:12:24] <Clark_Kent> Hahaha
[16:12:49] <Minty_Cream> keep us updated as the situation develops
#295
up
19
down
[17:09:55] <Keth> So you're saying that there are currently no laws in elysia?
[17:10:24] <Loki|Arrow> well it's called elysia for a reason, of course there are no laws
[17:10:36] <Dagaro> But it has a King?
[17:10:43] <Loki|Arrow> i didn't vote for him
[17:11:01] <Dagaro> He was chosen by the Lady of the Maw
[17:11:27] <Rev[a]n> Some fancy tart throwing swords out a blackhole is no basis for a government
#93
up
19
down
[17:10:51] <Crog> now make sound when you pooping , like TATATATATATa
#131
up
19
down
[23:12:12] <Selatos> var why are you being emo
[23:12:35] <Varfarius> I've got the heart break blues selatos. Sadly, it's not from my girlfriend.
[23:12:53] <Varfarius> Is it bad I feel more betrayed by a server than my own girlfriend when she won't put out?!
[23:13:24] <Selatos> if your server isn't putting out, i feel bad for you son, i got 99 problems, but a misconfig ain't one
#454
up
19
down
[18:38:11] <mikelsewhere> I want mine to say EAT PORG HERE
[18:38:53] <Kez> I missed what that is in response to
[18:39:07] <Kez> I imagine we are all getting matching tramp stamps
#3
up
20
down
[15:38:27] <Nalah> My mother marks the English national exams. She was marking one creative writing paper today, and she got to the bottom of the page of one that read "the doctor knelt down beside her and raped her" - she turned the page and it finished "leg in a bandage". Hehe.
#36
up
20
down
[03:01:42] <Bresarr_The_Hutt> Your character is not in the physical condition to perform any actions.
[03:01:49] <Bresarr_The_Hutt> Son of a bitch...the combine just called me fat...
[03:02:04] <Orphaea_Imperium> you're not fat, you're big flubbed
[03:02:32] <Light> You're not fat, you're ugly.
[03:03:11] <Bresarr_The_Hutt> Well...next time I think about slitting my wrists, I'm coming here to get the extra morale boost
#91
up
20
down
[14:16:05] <Panda_Prime> We only converse breifly and in short bursts! That's not knowing someone!
[14:16:36] <Ten> that's the internet equivalent of having shared a bed!
#121
up
20
down
(Kyle Rainer, who recently returned from a multi-year hiatus from SWC..)
[15:18:48] <Zhao> I feel like everyone should have me on colored in their address book
[15:18:54] <Zhao> Everything I say is super important
[15:20:03] * Kyle|Away is now known as Kyle
[15:20:22] <Kyle> somehow your ego has grown since I left
[15:20:37] <Jevon> Its had a long time to grow
[15:20:43] <Loki> I've been a good influence
[15:20:58] <Kyle> I mean in the like 40 minutes I was away
#123
up
20
down
<Jevon> You kno\, uyjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj4444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWS
<Jevon> tHE CAT SAYS HI, APPARENTLY
<Cait> o.O
#124
up
20
down
[04:15:29] <dot> Captcha read "How are you" and I typed good >_<
#410
up
20
down
<@Loki-cell> She only plays AI mode in heroes of the storm so she's not worth my time
#440
up
20
down
<blackhole> damn it. i got drunk yesterday and i apparently got a job
#7
up
21
down
[21:19] <Mikel> Want a secure place to keep that monthly paycheck? Need a loan? Want a bank built in that new city of yours? Think Universal Network Bank for all your banking needs! Visit #cmg-unb .
[21:20] <Keir> I want a loan! :D
[21:20] <Keir> As much money as I can get on no collateral :D
[21:21] <Mikel> What is cullatoral?
[21:21] <Keir> that's my type of bank!
#337
up
21
down
[13:25:42] <Altair> and grammatically its good nuff?
[13:25:55] <@Ten> depends on what you consider good enough
[13:26:26] <Altair> I spelled enough as nuff.
#112
up
21
down
[07:28:49] <Cherokee> ARE YOUR LEGS STILL TIRED SYN
[07:29:07] <Italian_Stallion_Loki> OH MY YES
[07:29:14] <Cherokee> WHY YOU YELLING
[07:29:18] <Italian_Stallion_Loki> YOU STARTED IT
[07:29:34] <Cherokee> YES BECAUSE YOU HAVE BAD INTERNET CONNECTION , WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU HEAR ME
#377
up
21
down
[23:31:48] * Loki offers a lindor ball
[23:31:48] <Superman> I don't like you.
[23:31:51] <Superman> That much.
[23:31:54] <Loki> oh
[23:31:56] * Loki retracts lindor ball
[23:32:09] <Superman> ... what the hell, at least give me a KISS
[23:32:13] <Loki> I don't have any!
[23:32:14] <Loki> I only have balls
[23:32:23] <Loki> You will take my balls and like it!
[23:32:29] <Superman> ... fine, I'll take one of your balls
[23:32:33] <Loki> they're creme filled
[23:32:38] <Loki> hold on I already put one in my mouth
[23:32:48] <Superman> But I want one in mine D:
[23:32:56] <Loki> ok this one is really white
[23:33:02] <Superman> kk
[23:33:19] * Loki inserts into Superman's mouth
[23:33:41] * Superman starts
[23:33:48] <Coleman> so you each have a ball in your mouths?
[23:33:50] * Loki finishes
[23:33:55] <dot> This is the worst cyber I've ever read
#399
up
21
down
[19:34:01] <Arjuna> Genital jousting is on sale, and my grandma gave me a card for christmas with steam wallet money
[19:34:12] <Arjuna> I... think she just bought me this game....
#150
up
21
down
<|||Ashlyana|||> In California you can always find a party, in Soviet Russia, party can always find you.
#17
up
22
down
[04:16:59] <Edward-Dalen> anyone know about the movement to redesign the keyboard?
[04:17:30] <Edward-Dalen> apparently qwerty is designed to make us type slow
[04:17:40] <Edward-Dalen> because it was designed for typewriters
[04:17:41] <Cypher_Diaz> convert to dvorak then ..
[04:17:44] <Edward-Dalen> that would jam
[04:17:58] <Vip_Fortuna> we need new words that do match better with the current keyboard setting.
[04:18:06] <Jaxom_Sky> ^
[04:18:12] <Jaxom_Sky> redesign words not the keyboard!
[04:18:15] <Cypher_Diaz> lol
[04:18:17] <Contabile_Quetzalxochitl> agreed
[04:18:20] <Cypher_Diaz> the obvious solution.

prev12345next