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#1
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[04:30:00] <Ran> Any Dungeon Master's or D&D/RPG players lurking around?
[04:30:22] <@Ten> syn is a pro dungeon master
[04:30:35] <.Loki> different kind of dungeon
#2
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[22:16:05] <Keir> Honestly, if I send Dreighton an eMail with a bug, you know something like "Faction Creation seems to be down", I don't expect it fixed for a good 3 months in the fucking first place, I hardly need a "I'm going grocery shopping, I'll check my eMails when I get back" announcement
[22:16:08] * Phryss is afk: Peeing. Logging: [on] Pager: [on]
#3
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[15:38:27] <Nalah> My mother marks the English national exams. She was marking one creative writing paper today, and she got to the bottom of the page of one that read "the doctor knelt down beside her and raped her" - she turned the page and it finished "leg in a bandage". Hehe.
#6
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[17:32:25] <Jerev> Million Man March!
[17:32:33] * Nalah (Nalah@SWC-IRC.454356B93E278.SWC) Quit (Ping timeout)
[17:33:37] <Jerev> How come everytime I say something, someone leaves?
[17:34:08] * Ed|uni (~Ed@SWC-IRC.AFDE1B3B8D90.SWC) Quit (Quit: ~ <RobertDerr> Az, I'm going to try to dock in you | Can't beat a good whack :P ~)
[17:36:47] <Jerev> Owned!
[17:36:55] * Cherokee (~tcherokee@SWC-IRC.BE173B7E3EF991.SWC) Quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
[17:37:01] <Jerev> Dammit!!
#7
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[21:19] <Mikel> Want a secure place to keep that monthly paycheck? Need a loan? Want a bank built in that new city of yours? Think Universal Network Bank for all your banking needs! Visit #cmg-unb .
[21:20] <Keir> I want a loan! :D
[21:20] <Keir> As much money as I can get on no collateral :D
[21:21] <Mikel> What is cullatoral?
[21:21] <Keir> that's my type of bank!
#8
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[17:27:06] <Phryss> Oh!
[17:27:07] <Phryss> Keir!
[17:27:15] <Phryss> I saw a girl today that reminded me of you.
[17:27:20] <Keir|NEW-GNS|Crap> !
[17:27:26] <Phryss> She had these ice packs on her shoulders
[17:27:32] <Keir|NEW-GNS|Crap> ^.-
[17:27:42] <Phryss> And they were being held in place by, like, saran wrap.
[17:27:49] <Keir|NEW-GNS|Crap> ...
[17:28:08] <Phryss> And the saran wrap wrapped tightly around her chest so her boobs were all squashed and invisible.
[17:28:15] <Phryss> The end.
#9
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[16:16:08] <Keir> Post-vasectomy pain syndrome. This is a very rare condition (approximately 1 in 10,000) where you get some dropping of the testicles after surgery (a few millimeters not meters) and an associated chronic pain, like someone continually pulling on your testicles. If this happens your days of boxers shorts are over and you will need good, supportive underwear.
[16:16:09] <Keir> hot
[16:16:50] <Phryss> I like the second parenthetical.
[16:17:05] <Phryss> As though someone would expect his testicles to drop a number of meters.
[16:17:49] <Phryss> "Oh, don't mind that. My scrotum just drags along the floor behind me since my vasectomy. Sometimes I trip over it. >: /"
#10
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[19:02:00] <Keir|MST3K> Squall
[19:02:13] <Squall_Chitose> yes?
[19:02:26] <Keir|MST3K> If you get shot in Iraq, promise me you'll scream either "Fucking camping bitch!" or "omg, he rolled a natural 20!" ?
#11
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[19:13:21] <Phryss> Does anyone else get really paranoid when you email people that you have never emailed before? I always fear getting marked as spam, so I end up writing really weird emails that don't include any URL and that read funny in an attempt not to sound like a spambot.
#12
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[19:34:58] <Mr_Tel> I'll even dip my balls in marinara sauce just so those bastards can have a taste of home while they're at it!
[19:35:19] <Asa> ...
[19:36:03] <Mr_Tel> c'mon guess what movie that's from!
[19:37:51] <Shado> The Papa John's training video?
#13
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[00:01:01] <Keir> I was hanging out with a bunch of tough black thugs, and I was trying to fit in and be one of them, but I was really nervous and when I tried to call them "mai homies", I think I said homos :(
[00:01:13] <Keir> I'm now in a bodycast
[00:01:44] <Keir> For those who couldn't tell, the above story was an obvious fabrication. It is a well-known fact Canada doesn't have black people.
#14
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[23:50:43] <Phryss> My family has this odd habit of not distinguishing between inlaws and...outlaws.
#15
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[17:44:06] * Cherokee[p] puts on his dress uniform and goes to the bingo hall
[17:44:36] <Cherokee[p]> I'm so lonely
[17:44:39] * Cherokee[p] sniffs
[17:44:46] * Cherokee[p] dabs as numbers are called
[17:44:58] <syn> You could hire Jackson for company
[17:45:11] <syn> He'd look a dashing trophy wife on your arm
[17:45:19] <Cherokee[p]> Tempting.
[17:45:37] <tgr316> I dont wear underwear. That way, you can tell when I poo
[17:45:43] <syn> I rescind my remark.
[17:45:55] <Cherokee[p]> Not as tempting any longer.
#16
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[18:15:32] <Phryss> I use HTML as a masturbatory aid.
#17
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[04:16:59] <Edward-Dalen> anyone know about the movement to redesign the keyboard?
[04:17:30] <Edward-Dalen> apparently qwerty is designed to make us type slow
[04:17:40] <Edward-Dalen> because it was designed for typewriters
[04:17:41] <Cypher_Diaz> convert to dvorak then ..
[04:17:44] <Edward-Dalen> that would jam
[04:17:58] <Vip_Fortuna> we need new words that do match better with the current keyboard setting.
[04:18:06] <Jaxom_Sky> ^
[04:18:12] <Jaxom_Sky> redesign words not the keyboard!
[04:18:15] <Cypher_Diaz> lol
[04:18:17] <Contabile_Quetzalxochitl> agreed
[04:18:20] <Cypher_Diaz> the obvious solution.
#18
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[15:56:42] <Cherokee> I think the reason I was so unpopular at school is I'd not only occasionally crap in my pants, but I'd occasionally crap in other kids' pants too.
#19
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[18:35:12] <Keir|Spying> "I gots me a watermelon" is not *bad* English, it is *alternative* English
#20
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[22:23:21] <blackhole> i think i'm gonna stop drinking one way or another some time soon
[22:32:20] <blackhole> gonna give it a try this oct
[22:32:51] <blackhole> if i stay sober for more than 2 months you owe me a beer
#21
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[15:17:26] * Vlash_Kimer yawns
[15:19:51] * Sidakin][Vos throws a golf ball into Vlash's mouth
[15:20:11] * Vlash_Kimer cock
[15:20:22] <syn> cock?
[15:20:24] <Vlash_Kimer> *chocks
[15:20:42] <Sidakin][Vos> ...........
[15:20:47] * Vlash_Kimer (~dolittle2@SWC-IRC.C54E5EC8A37450.TR) Quit (Quit: )
[15:20:47] <Sidakin][Vos> its chokes*
[15:20:48] <syn> It's okay, that's my first thought when someone is getting something shoved in their mouth, too.
[15:20:49] <Sidakin][Vos> xD!!!!!!!!!
[15:20:56] <Sidakin][Vos> He got embrassed
#22
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[13:22:27] <Bryce> If we break up, I am going to look for something more then 2 boobs and a vagina next time.
[13:23:02] <Togan> like what, three boobs and two vaginas?
#23
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[17:17:48] <Adam_Zad> "While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad."
#24
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[13:29:59] <Kast_Derrnon> Like they say in the hood... you best protect ya turf, smurf.
[13:30:43] <Chin> somehow that doesn't sound really like a tough guy line
[13:31:06] <Kast_Derrnon> Well then, obviously you nothing of urban culture.
#25
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[17:10:01] <Ezekiel> Ha, just found the book everyone signed when we finished high school
[17:10:17] <Ezekiel> Ahh... the memories
[17:11:57] <Saint_Tidus> The Sex Offender's Watch List?
#27
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[18:31:19] <blackhole> ya, cher leaves his impronta deep in me
[18:32:22] <Cherokee> I left what in you?! o_O
[18:33:32] <blackhole> aight, sometimes i should use the dictionary
[18:33:42] <blackhole> specially when it's followed by stuff like 'deep in me'
#28
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[18:10:15] <Keir> If it's "sick" to chain your eldest daughter in the basement, tell your wife she ran away, then use her as a brood mother for you to raise speechless mutants underground, then I guess we're all a little "sick"
#29
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[19:03:30] <blackhole> i heard so many wonderful stories about everywhere-butspain conn
[19:03:46] <blackhole> buttspain
[19:03:52] <blackhole> ah nm hehe
#30
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[15:43:05] <Laz|away> and by the way, what prompted this war in the first place?
[15:44:43] <Keir> Frezt's refusal to sign a treaty and grant Eidola one planet in Kathol space
[15:45:23] <Laz|away> and what did you need a planet in Kathol space for?
[15:45:57] <Keir> raising tauntauns
[15:46:57] <Laz|away> wouldn't one normally do that on Hoth.....in Churba?
[15:47:33] <Keir> We capture them in Hoth, and raise them in Kathol
[15:47:41] <Laz|away> and what happened to that story of a bridge between your territories?
[15:47:53] <Keir> lies concocted by our enemies to discredit us
[15:47:59] <Keir> we are simple tauntaun farmers
#31
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[20:22:21] <Citus_Navitas> Thank god for this conversation. I woke up this morning and just starting thinking "Man, I havent seen like 40 pictures of homoerotic statues today. What kind of life am I living?"
#32
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[23:43:27] * Naast has learned to stop clicking Keir's links now
[23:44:51] <Samuel_Flagg> I think I learned to not click on Keirs pictures back in about '02?
[23:45:31] <Keir> pfft, the hate
[23:45:38] <Meesis_Meeso> of???
[23:45:55] <Keir> fecal matter molded into interesting shapes with cookie cutters, in Flagg's case
#33
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[15:34:12] <Keir> The most trusted name in violence is now the most trusted name in banking! Eidola investments offers you a guaranteed 400% profit on your investments through one of our dedicated branch managers. Speak to us today, to ensure a brighter future!
[15:34:34] <Cesodevo> ...
[15:34:56] * Keir is now known as Person_in_Crowd
[15:35:01] <Person_in_Crowd> "Hey, these guys look legit!"
#34
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[00:48:05] <Hunter> now mass effect, that's a game
[00:48:09] <ArchonZei> ^
[00:48:10] <Light> It sure is. A game.
[00:48:42] <Kevin> Now SWC, that's an online community
[00:48:49] <Light> I.. suppose you're right
[00:48:52] <T`losk|Away> There's a community?
[00:49:11] <ArchonZei> We aren't a community!
[00:49:15] <ArchonZei> We're a mob.
[00:49:17] <Hunter> we're a mob
#35
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[23:16:55] <Wool> just dropped my container with all the cashews in it
[23:17:06] <Wool> now I've got bits and pieces of cashews all over the floor :(
[23:17:09] <Keir> for the last fucking time, pick your nuts up off the ground
#36
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[03:01:42] <Bresarr_The_Hutt> Your character is not in the physical condition to perform any actions.
[03:01:49] <Bresarr_The_Hutt> Son of a bitch...the combine just called me fat...
[03:02:04] <Orphaea_Imperium> you're not fat, you're big flubbed
[03:02:32] <Light> You're not fat, you're ugly.
[03:03:11] <Bresarr_The_Hutt> Well...next time I think about slitting my wrists, I'm coming here to get the extra morale boost
#37
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[02:11:30] <JackTLadd> So catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, Howww?
[02:11:30] <JackTLadd> nab him! jab him! tab him! grag him! catch that fishie now!
[02:12:01] * Admiral_Ackmin scatters
#38
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[18:16:40] <Xavian> is self enslavery allowable?
[18:18:52] <£> That isn't even a word, let alone a question that's specific enough to be answerable. >: /
[18:24:35] <Xavian> you know what I mean :P
[18:24:41] <Xavian> can I enslave myself
[18:26:10] <Xavian> hmm
[18:30:35] <£> I have no idea what you mean.
[18:30:46] <Xavian> I mean
[18:30:49] <Xavian> Sell myself
[18:30:50] <Xavian> :D
[18:31:04] <£> It sounds more like a philosophical question than a tech support one.
[18:31:09] <£> Sell yourself in what way?
[18:31:15] <Xavian> like
[18:31:19] <Xavian> ok
[18:31:27] <Xavian> you know NPCs?
[18:31:30] <Xavian> like that
[18:31:37] <Xavian> but I cost money!
[18:31:43] <Xavian> its foolproof
[18:31:52] <Xavian> seriously though
[18:31:59] <Xavian> its hard to explain
[18:32:02] <Xavian> hmmm
[18:32:05] <Xavian> aha
[18:32:07] <Xavian> its like
[18:32:09] <Xavian> labour
[18:32:15] <Xavian> but they have to pay
[18:32:23] <Xavian> but it has rp options
[18:32:54] <£> So...you want a job.
#39
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[21:23:43] <Cherokee> In addition to wooden shoes, the Netherlands is also famous for their wooden socks.
#40
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[13:45:43] <Kevin> How cold does it generally get there in the winter?
[13:45:54] <Skye_Varn> -20 to -30 up here
[13:46:12] <Skye_Varn> -35 if you're really lucky
[13:46:39] <Kevin> I used to live in New York, and it would easily get to single digits F with no wind chill during the winter
[13:46:50] <Ten> we're not talking F!
[13:46:53] <Kevin> So?
[13:46:55] <Skye_Varn> We're talking C
[13:47:01] <Ten> so you can F off
#41
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[22:44:51] <Away> We don't need Combat!
[22:45:00] <Away> SWCoders trading card game!
[22:45:37] <Sin> The Dreighton Card awards your side with an unfair advantage
[22:45:58] <Sin> The Syn card removes any card in play from the game >.>
[22:46:11] <Alex_Track> lol
[22:46:17] <Alex_Track> what about the Alex Card?
[22:46:27] <Sin> -5 Charisma
#42
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[17:14:57] <blackhole> so i'm sort of a wifi hooker now
[17:15:04] * Cherokee shakes his head
[17:15:44] <blackhole> yeah cher, i have a hairy man sat on my lap now
[17:15:49] <blackhole> it's the price so i can use his wifi
[17:16:05] <blackhole> both my arms are surounding his torso in order to type
[17:16:15] * Cherokee wishes it was him
#43
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[00:03:00] <Maw|BUSY-BRB> The other day even in southern Alberta there are hardly any I think I saw 5 two days ago... and -40 for 2 weeks is not "cool" -20 is cool :P
[00:04:02] <Cherokee> Your choice in structuring that sentence leads me to make the preliminary diagnosis that you've recently suffered a stroke.
#44
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[03:17:23] <Light> That's pretty much my favorite part of SWC. Something completely insignificant and random occurs and e-people start psychologically profiling you.
[03:17:46] <Pozz> it's phrases like that that get you branded a corpse-banger
[03:17:48] <Sleek> yeah, i agree with the rapist
#45
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[12:49:29] <Kevin> Man, weekends are pretty popular for piracy, huh?
[12:49:40] <Kevin> Demonoid and TPB seem to both be overloaded
[12:49:46] <Arthur> IC Piracy or bittorrent piracy?
[12:49:48] <Arthur> oh
[12:50:11] <Kevin> I think we all engage in some boat theft over the weekend, that's a given
#46
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[13:49:01] <£> Humph.
[13:49:08] <£> I was expecting a picture of your nipple.
[13:49:13] <£> You disappoint me.
[13:49:15] <Ayatollah_Khomo> Do you want one?
[13:49:20] <Mikel> I have one
[13:49:21] <Ayatollah_Khomo> I have one somewhere
[13:49:32] <£> You should have two.
[13:49:39] <£> And the location is pretty standard across all models.
#47
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[03:47:59] <Nash> howd the interview go?
[03:48:07] <Aikinar|> Good actually :D
[03:48:58] <Aikinar|> I was not so nervous as i would have thought
[03:50:03] <Ten> or maybe you didn't notice your own nervousness
[03:50:12] <Aikinar|> nah, i know when i'm nervous
[03:50:34] <Aikinar|> and i didn't sweat as a pig :D
[03:54:26] <Ten> maybe you were so nervous that your body couldn't even sweat!
[03:59:40] <Nash> have you checked your pants yet? Like make sure instead of sweating, you didn't accidentally soil yourself and the interview only went well because the interviewer felt he was in the presense of an unstable individual?
#48
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[21:20:51] <LT_Kylani> Major Black, Mind a pm
[21:21:25] <Greg_Black> Go ahead.
[21:22:31] <LT_Kylani> I officially regret asking Sir :p
[21:23:41] <Greg_Black> You asked, thus you recieved an answer. Not my fault you didn't expand upon what you meant by 'how I'm hanging'.
#49
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[20:10:43] <Cherokee> Melik, does your fiancee know about your swine clap?
[20:11:09] <Squall_Chitose> I have bovine chlamydia.
[20:15:37] <Melik_Tafari> no but you can suck your mother and find out if she has it
[20:16:06] <Cherokee> that makes no sense
[20:17:09] <Melik_Tafari> in deh islands where i live, it would be said as "suck ur mumma ras hole"... is that better?
[20:21:02] <Cherokee> no, but if you're implying my mother has pet rats in holes in the wall, its quite true. We keep them there to deter visitors who want to use the guest room, exercise room, home theater, game room, great room, captains roost, or poolside cabana deck.
#50
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[15:41:32] <Thirteen> well, I skipped my chemical romance
[15:42:42] <Jenos> Skipping's for girls or boxers. Are you a girl or a boxer?
[15:42:57] <Mikel> I wear boxers, does that count?
[15:43:01] <Light> Only if you're a girl.
[15:43:06] <Thirteen> I dated a girl boxer once
[15:43:13] <Light> Like, a female dog?
[15:43:23] <Thirteen> no, like a human female that boxes
[15:43:34] <Jenos> worked in a warehouse?
#51
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[15:44:11] <Mikel> I wear boxer-briefs so you can see the outline of my massive package
[15:44:24] <Jenos> Mikel, you're a postman?
[15:44:25] <Thirteen> the spare socks?
[15:44:47] <Thirteen> it was a good idea, but really, four socks?
[15:44:50] <Mikel> The best 4 inches you've ever seen, baby
[15:45:02] <Mikel> I mean... more than that?
#52
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[14:54:01] * EthanW tries to set chin on fire
[14:54:21] * Chin is made out of asbestos
[14:54:27] * Chin hugs Ethan
[14:54:39] <Chin> DIE!
[14:54:40] <EthanW> :'(
[14:54:43] <Chin> in 30 years or so!
#54
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[03:02:42] <Thirteen> the mosquito I whacked out of the sky with a sponge is drunk walking toward me
[03:03:08] <Thirteen> and no, that's not a fall out boy song title

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