Random

#16
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[18:15:32] <Phryss> I use HTML as a masturbatory aid.
#340
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[21:23:02] <%Lan> Everytime I write a line of code
[21:25:12] <&selatos> do you think about whether i would judge you for it?
[21:28:31] <%Lan> Yes :'(
[21:28:45] <&selatos> perfect :p
#454
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[18:38:11] <mikelsewhere> I want mine to say EAT PORG HERE
[18:38:53] <Kez> I missed what that is in response to
[18:39:07] <Kez> I imagine we are all getting matching tramp stamps
#169
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[16:24:13] <minty_sadness> this is bullshit
[16:24:37] <minty_sadness> if you can't launch bottle rockets from someone's anus then what's the fucking point of pledging to a fraternity?
#28
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[18:10:15] <Keir> If it's "sick" to chain your eldest daughter in the basement, tell your wife she ran away, then use her as a brood mother for you to raise speechless mutants underground, then I guess we're all a little "sick"
#55
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[11:43:21] * Riad_Sertage (~chatzilla@SWC-IRC.113BB7FF48F335.SWC) has joined #Help
[11:45:35] <Riad_Sertage> I never see any chatting is this a coinsidence or do you have to do something special to view the chat?
[11:47:19] <Riad_Sertage> Wait, If I can't see the chat Ican't see your answers... crap
[11:48:57] * Riad_Sertage (~chatzilla@SWC-IRC.113BB7FF48F335.SWC) Quit (Quit: ChatZilla 0.9.85 [Firefox 3.5.2/20090729225027])
#87
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* ThomasRed is now known as Thomas
* Thomas is now known as ThomasRed
* ThomasRed is now known as Thomas
<Thomas> Sh*t
<Thomas> Itw ont let me do ThomasRed afk
<Thomas> \It
<Thomas> wont
* Thomas is now known as ThomasRed
* ThomasRed is now known as Th{o}masRed
* Th{o}masRed is now known as Tho{masRed}
<Tho{masRed}> That means I am afk
<Tho{masRed}> :O
<Tho{masRed}> F*ck it
<Tho{masRed}> FIt wont let me o my nick the way I want
* Tho{masRed} is now known as ThomasRed_afk
<ThomasRed_afk> better
* ThomasRed_afk is now known as ThomasRed_going
* ThomasRed_going is now known as ThomasRed_afk
<Kun> he must have a 0 in computer operations...
#12
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[19:34:58] <Mr_Tel> I'll even dip my balls in marinara sauce just so those bastards can have a taste of home while they're at it!
[19:35:19] <Asa> ...
[19:36:03] <Mr_Tel> c'mon guess what movie that's from!
[19:37:51] <Shado> The Papa John's training video?
#145
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[17:22:20] <+Kevin||Sleep> I type with my penis
[17:22:33] <@Banquo> In other words, he can barely reach the keyboard.
#398
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[14:33:56] <Hank> how you get testes if your force
[14:34:12] <Raidan> Most guys are born with testes
[14:34:20] <Raidan> Doesn't need the force :S
[14:34:56] <Hank> test***
[14:34:58] <Hank> sorry lol
#15
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[17:44:06] * Cherokee[p] puts on his dress uniform and goes to the bingo hall
[17:44:36] <Cherokee[p]> I'm so lonely
[17:44:39] * Cherokee[p] sniffs
[17:44:46] * Cherokee[p] dabs as numbers are called
[17:44:58] <syn> You could hire Jackson for company
[17:45:11] <syn> He'd look a dashing trophy wife on your arm
[17:45:19] <Cherokee[p]> Tempting.
[17:45:37] <tgr316> I dont wear underwear. That way, you can tell when I poo
[17:45:43] <syn> I rescind my remark.
[17:45:55] <Cherokee[p]> Not as tempting any longer.
#430
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[16:53:26] <selatos> this isn't like sex
[16:53:34] <selatos> the faster you finish the more you can do it
[16:53:48] <Loki> how is that not like sex
[16:54:18] <selatos> everyone is happier when sex is not the shortest possible
[16:54:27] <Loki> but you can still do it more the faster you finish!
[16:54:29] <Loki> its efficient
[16:54:32] <Loki> if your goal is as many sex as possible
[16:54:41] <Loki> the refractory period starts earlier, but it also ends earlier!
[16:54:52] <Loki> or as I like to call it, the global cooldown
[16:54:53] <selatos> but then your girl gets annoyed and leaves
[16:55:04] <selatos> so total time spent sexing is shorter
[16:55:05] <Loki> that just means you didnt secure the handcuffs well enough
#359
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[08:05:01] <selatos> new server, yo
[08:05:45] * Loki strokes it
[17:31:16] <selatos> i only stroke it in private
[17:31:28] <selatos> maybe you need to be more discreet
[17:53:18] <Loki> this is private! It's just me and two other dudes
[18:37:09] <Superman> Did you just assume my gender?
[18:53:45] <Loki> sorry what are your preferred pronouns
[18:54:04] <Loki> I just kinda went by the "man" part of your name but now I realize that was foolish of me and it could simply be a surname
[18:58:31] <Superman> I prefer the guttural sound of man, but my preferred pronouns include 'phi' and 'phur'
[18:58:43] <Superman> My preference of the sound of the word man does not denote my gender
#88
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[00:11] <Asa> pretty sure my in character daddy is dead
[00:11] <@JohnnyFox> Luke thought the same thing.
#130
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[15:32] * Lilly smiles at Stephy, the best woman.
[15:32] <@Horley_Cyan> Scott take the ring and place it in Lilly's finger
[15:32] <@Horley_Cyan> On Lilly's finger :)
[15:33] * Neria gigle
[15:33] <.Neria> s
[15:33] * Chin suppresses a laugh by coughing politely
[15:33] * Scott_Hood takes the ring and places it on Lilly´s finger ( http://custom.swcombine.com/static/12/225/1-1196055-1347999164-large.jpg )
[15:33] * Django slap chin on the back to help him cough
[15:34] * Rus_Pendragon said ssshh to chin
[15:34] <@Horley_Cyan> Lilly can u please take the ring and place it on Scott's finger
[15:34] * Finar_the_Hutt shifts slightly (a large movement for a hutt)
[15:34] * Lilly gently holds Scott's hand and slides the ring onto his finger.
[15:35] * Stonewall_Lee takes a swig from his flask
[15:37] * var (var@swc-irc.n57.837.v1n9rq.IP) has joined #House_Derycke
[15:37] <@Horley_Cyan> Your lives before this day were but small streams running down a hillside, today you have become one and together are a force that can accomplish great tasks. Always remember this and few things will ever become a hindrance to u
[15:38] * var walks into the building, into the isle and looks about for a brief moment. He promptly drops his drawers, squats and takes a shit, then turns and walks back out with his trousers still around his ankles.
[15:38] * var (var@swc-irc.n57.837.v1n9rq.IP) has left #House_Derycke
[15:38] * Neria sets mode +b *!var@swc-irc.n57.837.v1n9rq.IP for #House_Derycke
[15:38] <Leebri_Chelski> O.O
[15:38] <Leebri_Chelski> Seriously
[15:39] <Leebri_Chelski> ****
[15:39] * Lilly God modes badly
[15:39] * Anax sipps his beer
[15:39] * Stonewall_Lee cleans up the Dug excrement
[15:39] <+Rus_Pendragon> ****
[15:39] <@Stephy> sssh...
[15:39] <%Count_Ketwol> (hes Kaleesh now)
#10
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[19:02:00] <Keir|MST3K> Squall
[19:02:13] <Squall_Chitose> yes?
[19:02:26] <Keir|MST3K> If you get shot in Iraq, promise me you'll scream either "Fucking camping bitch!" or "omg, he rolled a natural 20!" ?
#186
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<DA> haha pornhub tweeted "Don't try and upload the superbowl game, we don't allow rape"
<Azarin> Ahahahaha
<@Superman> haha
<Squall_Chitose> I'm disturbed that you follow pornhub on twitter, Deric.
<Squall_Chitose> Disturbed, but not surprised.
#441
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[08:42:14] <Kez> this bot is like the greatest relevent fox provider I've ever seen
[08:43:02] <Lokitty> How many relevant fox providers have you seen, kez?
[08:43:09] <Lokitty> Because I feel that might be a low bar
[08:43:20] <Kez> I drink to forget the former fox providers
[08:43:33] <Kez> Highly let down by the misleading Fox News
[08:43:41] <Kez> barely provides any foxes!
[08:43:50] <Lokitty> Ah that was your first mistake, expecting fox news to provide you with foxes, or news
#295
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[17:09:55] <Keth> So you're saying that there are currently no laws in elysia?
[17:10:24] <Loki|Arrow> well it's called elysia for a reason, of course there are no laws
[17:10:36] <Dagaro> But it has a King?
[17:10:43] <Loki|Arrow> i didn't vote for him
[17:11:01] <Dagaro> He was chosen by the Lady of the Maw
[17:11:27] <Rev[a]n> Some fancy tart throwing swords out a blackhole is no basis for a government
#14
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[23:50:43] <Phryss> My family has this odd habit of not distinguishing between inlaws and...outlaws.
#22
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[13:22:27] <Bryce> If we break up, I am going to look for something more then 2 boobs and a vagina next time.
[13:23:02] <Togan> like what, three boobs and two vaginas?
#399
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[19:34:01] <Arjuna> Genital jousting is on sale, and my grandma gave me a card for christmas with steam wallet money
[19:34:12] <Arjuna> I... think she just bought me this game....
#123
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<Jevon> You kno\, uyjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj4444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444444zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWS
<Jevon> tHE CAT SAYS HI, APPARENTLY
<Cait> o.O
#108
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[07:46:47] <blackhole> i can't eat a whole pie in a day! it's like 50cmx50cm big
[07:51:55] <Cherokee> thats crazy , no one measures things in cm
[07:52:00] <Cherokee> how many inches is?
[07:56:50] <blackhole> not sure. inches are short enough to accumulate too much error
[07:56:57] <blackhole> but in cocks should be like 3
[07:57:04] <Syn> wait what
[07:58:08] <Cherokee> ..
[07:58:16] <Syn> cocks is now a unit of measurement
[07:58:27] <Cherokee> what's the cock length?!
[07:58:30] <blackhole> i work with what i have!
[07:58:42] <Cherokee> WHY ARE YOU MEASURING PIES WITH YOUR COCK
[07:58:53] <blackhole> i swear i tried to measure it with my inches but it looked inaccurate
[07:58:56] <Cherokee> PEOPLE HAVE TO EAT THAT
[07:58:58] <blackhole> haha
[07:59:04] <blackhole> i'm not measuring depth!
#122
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<Arthur_J_Alonzo> Investing in socks. Is it worth it?
<Loki> yes, they keep your feet warm
<Loki> I almost never go without them
<Arthur_J_Alonzo> Oops ment stocks
<Loki> oh, no
<Loki> They dont even keep your feet warm
#219
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[19:46:28] <@mikelsewhere> Boy Sentenced to Jail Because of Large Penis
[19:46:29] <@mikelsewhere> A Russian court tried a 13-year-old as an adult based on the size of his genitals
[19:46:37] <Sigmund_von_Ismay> Well shit.
[19:46:46] <Sigmund_von_Ismay> I'm going to be tried like a black man.
[19:47:10] <@mikelsewhere> Presumed guilty and murdered on the street it is, then
#95
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[07:56] <&Zhao> Morning Vey
[07:59] <&Jesfa> , the australian said aloud.
[08:03] <&Zhao> ...stop narrating my life!
[08:04] <&Jesfa> , he mumbled angrily under his breath.
[08:05] <&Zhao> .......
[08:05] <&Jesfa> The australian, so stupid as he was, was incapable of forming words.
#52
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[14:54:01] * EthanW tries to set chin on fire
[14:54:21] * Chin is made out of asbestos
[14:54:27] * Chin hugs Ethan
[14:54:39] <Chin> DIE!
[14:54:40] <EthanW> :'(
[14:54:43] <Chin> in 30 years or so!
#82
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[03:27] <Bryce> SWC is my facebook!
[03:28] <.Light> and just like on facebook, you have no friends
#124
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[04:15:29] <dot> Captcha read "How are you" and I typed good >_<
#98
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[05:02:41] <blackhole> why do i know how to spell cthulhu and not jirafee?
#341
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[16:11:55] <Kilian> Lee Lee, Keth is our local night walker
[16:12:30] <Keth> bleh!
[16:12:34] * Keth avoids garlic
[16:12:49] <Kilian> no I meant male prostitue
[16:13:49] <Keth> bleh!
[16:13:54] * Keth avoids the popo
#147
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[12:46:00] <+Samuel_York> I downloaded a movie for my dad, 28 weeks later, and he's complaining that the captions are in French
[12:47:19] <+Hal_Kinda_Away> Bonjour. Je m'appelle Zombie. Vous est petit dejeuner, oui?
[12:47:40] <Ji`vani> Cerveaux! Cerveaux!
#423
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[22:58:39] <Dalovan_Lombardo> How was the race Blackhole?
[22:59:03] <blackhole> i finished it and didn't end the 8000th so that's great
[22:59:22] <Dalovan_Lombardo> Good good
[23:00:03] <blackhole> and how are you? tell me about yourself
[23:00:06] * blackhole (blackhole@swc-irc.7do.9pm.1cvv54.IP) Quit (Quit: <Loki> past. Help! My scientist friend showed me his time machine, which keeps sending me three seconds into the)
[23:01:43] * blackhole (blackhole@swc-irc.7do.9pm.1cvv54.IP) has joined #SWC-Members
[23:01:58] <Dalovan_Lombardo> Why do he keep leaving :-(
[23:02:49] <blackhole> it's called conceptual art
[23:03:23] <Dalovan_Lombardo> Hmm
[23:03:26] <Mora> It is called fatherhood
[23:03:28] <blackhole> also, this way, i never know if you are pregnant
#131
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[23:12:12] <Selatos> var why are you being emo
[23:12:35] <Varfarius> I've got the heart break blues selatos. Sadly, it's not from my girlfriend.
[23:12:53] <Varfarius> Is it bad I feel more betrayed by a server than my own girlfriend when she won't put out?!
[23:13:24] <Selatos> if your server isn't putting out, i feel bad for you son, i got 99 problems, but a misconfig ain't one
#382
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[23:49:21] <Kivan_Hamner> Twas the night before Christmas and all throughout the house
[23:49:29] <Kivan_Hamner> the AC was blowing, cause I live in the South
#118
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[22:42:21] <Cherokee> pink cotton candy
[22:42:27] <Cherokee> yes , i ate you all first
[22:42:30] <Cherokee> you disappoint me
[22:42:33] <Cherokee> blue is way better
[22:42:36] <Cherokee> blue cotton candy
[22:42:40] <Cherokee> i saved you for last
[22:42:57] <Cherokee> lets take our time , and go slow... i know you'll make the enjoyment so much sweeter for me
[22:45:44] * Cherokee turns down the lights
[22:45:56] * Cherokee snuggles bag close
[22:46:39] * Cherokee reaches hand into the opening and teases a soft fluffy piece of cloudy heaven free and puts it in his mouth to let it dissolve into blissful sweetness
#370
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[19:06:04] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:06] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:14] <ETJ> We did it out of order.
[19:06:15] <ETJ> Try again.
[19:06:17] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:25] <Loki> yeah but they go bad so quickly
[19:06:38] <ETJ> You're out of phase.
[19:06:40] <Loki> oops
[19:06:42] <ETJ> Your time machine broke
[19:06:45] <ETJ> Lets do this again
[19:06:47] <Loki> write that down for a few days from now
[19:06:47] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:51] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:55] <ETJ> Damn.
#93
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[17:10:51] <Crog> now make sound when you pooping , like TATATATATATa
#89
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[14:53:00] <Cherokee> i bit myself in a retarded way now there is a piece of meat hanging from my mouth
#38
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[18:16:40] <Xavian> is self enslavery allowable?
[18:18:52] <£> That isn't even a word, let alone a question that's specific enough to be answerable. >: /
[18:24:35] <Xavian> you know what I mean :P
[18:24:41] <Xavian> can I enslave myself
[18:26:10] <Xavian> hmm
[18:30:35] <£> I have no idea what you mean.
[18:30:46] <Xavian> I mean
[18:30:49] <Xavian> Sell myself
[18:30:50] <Xavian> :D
[18:31:04] <£> It sounds more like a philosophical question than a tech support one.
[18:31:09] <£> Sell yourself in what way?
[18:31:15] <Xavian> like
[18:31:19] <Xavian> ok
[18:31:27] <Xavian> you know NPCs?
[18:31:30] <Xavian> like that
[18:31:37] <Xavian> but I cost money!
[18:31:43] <Xavian> its foolproof
[18:31:52] <Xavian> seriously though
[18:31:59] <Xavian> its hard to explain
[18:32:02] <Xavian> hmmm
[18:32:05] <Xavian> aha
[18:32:07] <Xavian> its like
[18:32:09] <Xavian> labour
[18:32:15] <Xavian> but they have to pay
[18:32:23] <Xavian> but it has rp options
[18:32:54] <£> So...you want a job.
#106
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[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> if I had a nickel for everytime Ten tried to get me to talk about my penis, I'd have like a buck twenty
[16:09] <.Syn> That's oddly specific
[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> you don't keep track?
[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> I'm keeping it in my online rape journal
#450
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[12:42:17] <@ArjunAway> how can I be hot and cold at the same time?
[12:42:23] <@ArjunAway> I'm shivering and sweating
[12:42:41] <@Sid> Meth is a hell of a drug
#205
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[12:20:27] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> There isn't already a neon green skin. There was already a pink skin used by the smallest portion of the player base.
[12:21:01] <GEOFFREY> I don't recall ever seeing the pink one then.
[12:21:12] <GEOFFREY> Red, Black, Default Blue
[12:21:26] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> Green, grey, sith, and pink are the others
[12:21:32] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> And another blue I believe
[12:23:39] <MINTY_CREAM> two shades of gray, two shades of blue, two shades of green, two shades of red
[12:24:37] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> The highly unsuccessful sequel to 50 shades
#100
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[02:49:24] <Dan_Goulet> how does voice work?
[02:49:30] <Dan_Goulet> dont see a button or anything
[02:49:42] <Ten> http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_do_people_make_sound
#34
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[00:48:05] <Hunter> now mass effect, that's a game
[00:48:09] <ArchonZei> ^
[00:48:10] <Light> It sure is. A game.
[00:48:42] <Kevin> Now SWC, that's an online community
[00:48:49] <Light> I.. suppose you're right
[00:48:52] <T`losk|Away> There's a community?
[00:49:11] <ArchonZei> We aren't a community!
[00:49:15] <ArchonZei> We're a mob.
[00:49:17] <Hunter> we're a mob
#306
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[20:01:45] <@Mikel> I put peanut butter on my brown sugar
[20:01:56] <@Mikel> but her name is Sholonda
[20:02:01] <Kilian> Oh my
#101
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[16:03:50] * Galdayo_Everstar (Mibbit@swc-irc.52l.oeg.s3gket.IP) has joined #swc-members
[16:04:23] <Galdayo_Everstar> Hello
[16:04:30] <Eldrwyn_D`Auvergne> Hallo fair maiden
[16:04:43] <Galdayo_Everstar> I'm a guy
[16:04:51] <Eldrwyn_D`Auvergne> im sorry we're full
#168
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[21:18:32] <@Zhao> Life must have been hard growing up south of the Mississipi
[21:18:33] <@Zhao> >.>
[21:18:37] <@Zhao> Or however the fuck it's spelt
[21:18:52] <&Selatos> dude the mississippi runs north-south
[21:19:03] <&Selatos> you grow up either east or west of it :P
#80
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[11:14] <@Dac_Kain> I paid for a bribe once, 7 days later I got a mail order russian lady at my door. Boy do I need glasses