Random

#450
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[12:42:17] <@ArjunAway> how can I be hot and cold at the same time?
[12:42:23] <@ArjunAway> I'm shivering and sweating
[12:42:41] <@Sid> Meth is a hell of a drug
#112
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[07:28:49] <Cherokee> ARE YOUR LEGS STILL TIRED SYN
[07:29:07] <Italian_Stallion_Loki> OH MY YES
[07:29:14] <Cherokee> WHY YOU YELLING
[07:29:18] <Italian_Stallion_Loki> YOU STARTED IT
[07:29:34] <Cherokee> YES BECAUSE YOU HAVE BAD INTERNET CONNECTION , WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU HEAR ME
#285
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[10:31:15] <@Twelve> Medical procedures performed in ancient Africa before they were performed in Europe include vaccination, autopsy, limb traction and broken bone setting, bullet removal, brain surgery, skin grafting, filling of dental cavities, installation of false teeth, what is now known as Caesarean section, anesthesia and tissue cauterization (3).
[10:31:21] <@Twelve> bullet removal
[10:31:31] <@Twelve> ancient africa was advanced as fuck
[10:31:48] <@Twelve> they were shooting black people long before ferguson
#75
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[01:32] <.Keir|Away> Hint: Never let your planets go uncontrolled, even for ten hours, when Keir is in-sector with a hyper 14 ship
[01:32] * .Keir|Away eyes faction about to lose two planets to hidden cities :D
[01:38] <+T`losk|Away> zomgish. :O
[01:53] <+Orphaea_Imperium> not any of mine? >_>
[01:55] * .Keir|Away waves, smirking at Orph
[01:55] <+Orphaea_Imperium> you go hell
[01:55] <+Orphaea_Imperium> >:/
[01:55] <+Orphaea_Imperium> although I only have one planet...
[01:56] <.Keir|Away> Did it go uncontrolled recently?
[01:56] <+Orphaea_Imperium> recent-ish
[01:56] <+Orphaea_Imperium> for about ten hours
[01:56] <+Orphaea_Imperium> >_>
#47
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[03:47:59] <Nash> howd the interview go?
[03:48:07] <Aikinar|> Good actually :D
[03:48:58] <Aikinar|> I was not so nervous as i would have thought
[03:50:03] <Ten> or maybe you didn't notice your own nervousness
[03:50:12] <Aikinar|> nah, i know when i'm nervous
[03:50:34] <Aikinar|> and i didn't sweat as a pig :D
[03:54:26] <Ten> maybe you were so nervous that your body couldn't even sweat!
[03:59:40] <Nash> have you checked your pants yet? Like make sure instead of sweating, you didn't accidentally soil yourself and the interview only went well because the interviewer felt he was in the presense of an unstable individual?
#146
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[23:16:15] <Banquo> I'll pretend to be a Tylger.
[23:18:32] <Banquo> Seriously, you come out blasting, and I'll smoke a cigar and act like I'm rich.
#110
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[10:21:03] <blackhole> man my last clorophorm date was awful
[10:59:59] <Cherokee> colored prom?
[11:00:17] <Cherokee> you took a black girl to her prom? Aren't you a little old for that?
[11:01:41] <blackhole> geez man, you're making it sound like if i colored her myself
#430
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[16:53:26] <selatos> this isn't like sex
[16:53:34] <selatos> the faster you finish the more you can do it
[16:53:48] <Loki> how is that not like sex
[16:54:18] <selatos> everyone is happier when sex is not the shortest possible
[16:54:27] <Loki> but you can still do it more the faster you finish!
[16:54:29] <Loki> its efficient
[16:54:32] <Loki> if your goal is as many sex as possible
[16:54:41] <Loki> the refractory period starts earlier, but it also ends earlier!
[16:54:52] <Loki> or as I like to call it, the global cooldown
[16:54:53] <selatos> but then your girl gets annoyed and leaves
[16:55:04] <selatos> so total time spent sexing is shorter
[16:55:05] <Loki> that just means you didnt secure the handcuffs well enough
#2
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[22:16:05] <Keir> Honestly, if I send Dreighton an eMail with a bug, you know something like "Faction Creation seems to be down", I don't expect it fixed for a good 3 months in the fucking first place, I hardly need a "I'm going grocery shopping, I'll check my eMails when I get back" announcement
[22:16:08] * Phryss is afk: Peeing. Logging: [on] Pager: [on]
#190
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[10:39:33] <Luke_Whitelock> you said park not me
[10:39:40] <Loki> If I can drive 2 hours you can walk 10 minutes.
[10:40:16] <Luke_Whitelock> I can't go into town that why I said here
[10:40:33] <Loki> ..Why not?
[10:40:39] <Squall_Chitose> Your mommy won't let you leave?
[10:40:40] <Varlathotep> Because his family that surprised him is there!
[10:40:44] <Varlathotep> Pay attention Loki!
[10:40:47] <Ten> gps anklet tracker
[10:40:48] <Luke_Whitelock> last time I did I was close to being hit by a truck
[10:40:53] <Ten> ...
[10:40:56] <Loki> hahah
[10:41:10] <Ten> and there was a black cat
[10:41:15] <Ten> and it rained
[10:41:32] <Luke_Whitelock> they were on the side walk
[10:41:40] <Loki> oh no now you can never go on the sidewalk again
[10:42:06] <Luke_Whitelock> yes so I can't go into town
[10:42:11] <Loki> not ever again
[10:42:14] <Loki> you're stuck inside forever
[10:42:23] <Luke_Whitelock> yes
[10:42:26] <Ten> he can go in the yard
[10:42:28] <Ten> no trucks there
[10:42:32] <Varlathotep> You never know.
[10:42:38] <Varlathotep> Those fire engines are wild man.
[10:42:52] <Loki> man its a good thing you live in the middle of nowhere so you can hide from all of the scary things in the world like people and cars and sunlight
[10:43:04] <Loki> and very small rocks
[10:47:11] <Luke_Whitelock> just because you like to be hit by cars don't mean I want to
[10:47:32] <Loki> I have eyes, so like, usually I look at the street to make sure I'm not stepping in front of one
[10:47:35] <Loki> maybe you should try that
[10:47:51] <Loki> life advice right here, cars are not ants, you can actually see them coming
[10:48:10] <Luke_Whitelock> I don't walk on the road loki
[10:48:16] <Loki> You dont walk at all from the sounds of it
[10:48:22] <Squall_Chitose> Dude, even chickens cross the road.
#117
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<Mikel> Anyone happen to be selling 12 sets of IRG?
<Mikel> or am I going to have to steal them from wherever I assume we're storing like 5000 sets
* Mikel eyeshifts.
<Ellias> you mean you don't steal your factions equipment ofr personal use?
<Ellias> waste of powers if you ask me
<Mikel> Seele would probably get mad and spank me
<Mikel> related: the NPC fit out I'm creating is stupidly complicated
<Mikel> IRG armor needs a belt
<Mikel> otherwise my NPCs will be mismatched
<Mikel> and that would be a FASHION DISASTER
<Mikel> bandits would be talking shit about me on Bravo
<Mikel> "Did you see that bitch? Had the NERVE to come up on our camp in his last-season Imperial Munitions shit. Amateur."
#129
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[10:46:31] <Selatos> D: doctor's office was uncomfortable, but productive i suppose
[10:48:06] <Selatos> two words: prostate exam
[10:48:16] <Selatos> maybe three, surprise prostate exam
#168
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[21:18:32] <@Zhao> Life must have been hard growing up south of the Mississipi
[21:18:33] <@Zhao> >.>
[21:18:37] <@Zhao> Or however the fuck it's spelt
[21:18:52] <&Selatos> dude the mississippi runs north-south
[21:19:03] <&Selatos> you grow up either east or west of it :P
#14
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[23:50:43] <Phryss> My family has this odd habit of not distinguishing between inlaws and...outlaws.
#106
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[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> if I had a nickel for everytime Ten tried to get me to talk about my penis, I'd have like a buck twenty
[16:09] <.Syn> That's oddly specific
[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> you don't keep track?
[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> I'm keeping it in my online rape journal
#94
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[21:37] <Squall_Chitose> I'm going to write a story about my Dong, Jenos.
[21:37] <Quetzalxochitl> you called your dong jenos?
[21:37] <%Jenos-Laptop> :P
[21:37] <Guinar> Short story, right?
[21:37] <%Jenos-Laptop> bastards
#163
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<Guinar> Only you would bring a penis to a car fight, Squall.
#410
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<@Loki-cell> She only plays AI mode in heroes of the storm so she's not worth my time
#73
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[03:44] <Bryce> so....tell me about your character?
[03:44] <tycho> im sexy
[03:45] <Bryce> ok...tell me things that my character would know by meeting you.
[03:45] <tycho> im sexy
#153
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[16:38:42] <Mikel> People seem to get pissed when you blow up a planet with a death star, for some reason.
[16:40:24] <Tarrok> Not the people on the planet you've blown up.
[16:40:33] <Tarrok> I think the solution is evident.
#345
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[03:19:15] <Loki> ten aftershocks so far
[03:19:47] <Ten> are you saying I'm fat
[03:21:56] <Loki> I'm saying you rocked my world for at least a minute and a half, with several breaks in the middle
[03:23:20] <Ten> that's what I'm known for
[03:23:25] <Ten> a minute and a half with several breaks
#86
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<Darwyn_family_bonding> "2nd place is a shiny new and highly sought after viper, this baby is in preteen condition and ready to go"
<Lex_von_Ismay> :o
<Lex_von_Ismay> lol
<Darwyn_family_bonding> preteen condition?
<Darwyn_family_bonding> wow
<Rehon_Mosspim> well, that's a typo lol
<Rehon_Mosspim> pristine, preteen, what's the diffrence
<Rehon_Mosspim> well, that's our faction, we love the miners
#178
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[10:23:59] <@Ten> go cry your white tears elsewhere
[10:24:35] <.Loki|starkphone> My tears aren't white, you are thinking of my semen
#15
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[17:44:06] * Cherokee[p] puts on his dress uniform and goes to the bingo hall
[17:44:36] <Cherokee[p]> I'm so lonely
[17:44:39] * Cherokee[p] sniffs
[17:44:46] * Cherokee[p] dabs as numbers are called
[17:44:58] <syn> You could hire Jackson for company
[17:45:11] <syn> He'd look a dashing trophy wife on your arm
[17:45:19] <Cherokee[p]> Tempting.
[17:45:37] <tgr316> I dont wear underwear. That way, you can tell when I poo
[17:45:43] <syn> I rescind my remark.
[17:45:55] <Cherokee[p]> Not as tempting any longer.
#219
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[19:46:28] <@mikelsewhere> Boy Sentenced to Jail Because of Large Penis
[19:46:29] <@mikelsewhere> A Russian court tried a 13-year-old as an adult based on the size of his genitals
[19:46:37] <Sigmund_von_Ismay> Well shit.
[19:46:46] <Sigmund_von_Ismay> I'm going to be tried like a black man.
[19:47:10] <@mikelsewhere> Presumed guilty and murdered on the street it is, then
#23
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[17:17:48] <Adam_Zad> "While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad."
#286
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[11:08:58] <%Hudson> Starting build 5075 for job hoth (previous build: STILL FAILING -- last SUCCESS #4690 4 mo 3 days ago)
[11:09:52] <Brand> If you wanted something to tell you that you're a failure and that your last success was months ago, why not just get married?
#441
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[08:42:14] <Kez> this bot is like the greatest relevent fox provider I've ever seen
[08:43:02] <Lokitty> How many relevant fox providers have you seen, kez?
[08:43:09] <Lokitty> Because I feel that might be a low bar
[08:43:20] <Kez> I drink to forget the former fox providers
[08:43:33] <Kez> Highly let down by the misleading Fox News
[08:43:41] <Kez> barely provides any foxes!
[08:43:50] <Lokitty> Ah that was your first mistake, expecting fox news to provide you with foxes, or news
#84
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[23:02] <Clarr> I do, but first admit you're talking out of your ass
[23:02] <Clarr> go on, I'm waiting
[23:02] <Bane> Is that physically possible?
[23:03] <Keir> I admit that I am talking out of my ass, though it seems my ass has outwitted you
#252
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[23:07:47] <Keth> beating the emu sounds like it would be australian slang for jacking off
#102
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[10:31:33] <Cherokee> I've eaten 14 boxes of Thin Mints...
[10:31:39] <Cherokee> but I haven't gotten any thinner :(
#71
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[02:36] <Cherokee> I don't go to the beach anymore. Not since the last time they succeeded in "rescuing" me by pushing me into the water.
[02:37] <Nalah> Who are they?
[02:37] <Seele> Greenpeace.
#248
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[00:47:36] <blackhole> oh, ukrania dissolved the gov too
[00:48:10] <blackhole> man, the re-enablement of member requirements is screwing everyone
#113
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[01:35:25] <G`no> If the days comes when we all go to prison for downloading music 'illegally', I hope they seperate us by genre.
[02:22:59] <G`no> The first two guys thought SUperman was a bird or a plane... why the heck were they excited?
[02:48:48] <G`no> I;m going to district 9 and 3 quarters.
[16:49:25] <G`no> If you took all the Twilight fans and laid them end to end around the equator, a lot of them would drown, get run over, or eaten by lions, so it's a really good idea.
[17:45:39] <G`no> Whenever a bird craps on my car, I eat a plate of scrambled eggs on my porch to let them know what I'm capable of.
[21:59:04] <G`no> I hate it when I'm singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong
[00:06:37] <G`no> If you take a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back?
[00:06:43] <G`no> I NEED AN ANSWER MUCH FASTER!!!
[20:01:13] <G`no> i can't wait to go back to england and open a time capsule i buried when i was 10
[20:01:25] <G`no> i wanna see how big my puppy got
[20:13:30] <G`no> Ugh, I hate bragging about my financial status, but I have to say, my credit card company keeps calling me to tell me my balance is outstanding!
#52
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[14:54:01] * EthanW tries to set chin on fire
[14:54:21] * Chin is made out of asbestos
[14:54:27] * Chin hugs Ethan
[14:54:39] <Chin> DIE!
[14:54:40] <EthanW> :'(
[14:54:43] <Chin> in 30 years or so!
#11
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[19:13:21] <Phryss> Does anyone else get really paranoid when you email people that you have never emailed before? I always fear getting marked as spam, so I end up writing really weird emails that don't include any URL and that read funny in an attempt not to sound like a spambot.
#191
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[20:40:57] <Luke_Whitelock> I was a pilot for some people but I was stuck in a Y-wing
[20:41:07] <Luke_Whitelock> so I drop my guy
[20:41:31] <Sol_Savrek> Why did you lock yourself in a Y-Wing?
[20:41:48] <Luke_Whitelock> I did not I was attack in hyper space
[20:41:59] <Loki> ah yes with ship combat
[20:42:02] <Sol_Savrek> No you werent
[20:42:07] <Loki> and was your ship damaged in the attack
[20:42:10] <Sol_Savrek> You cant battle in hyperspace
[20:42:18] <Sol_Savrek> I call lies!
[20:42:45] <Luke_Whitelock> I was attack by pirates
[20:42:49] <Loki> which pirates?
[20:43:00] <Luke_Whitelock> they had a integrator gravity wall
[20:43:27] <Luke_Whitelock> no clue just said pirates
[20:44:37] <Luke_Whitelock> so I was stuck in space
[20:45:05] <Luke_Whitelock> had no were to go could not see where I was
[20:45:20] <Loki> How do you know you were attacked then
[20:45:22] <Mephiston> This sounds exciting, I want to play the game this guy is playing.
#338
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[22:23:12] <Carlisle> Hmm. My best man speech is clocking in at 5 minutes 10 seconds. I think I need to trim some of it.
[22:23:17] <Carlisle> Or speed up the delivery.
[22:31:58] <Twelve> just remove every single pause
[22:32:44] <Carlisle> But those are the spots I breathe.
[22:33:18] <Twelve> ugh
[22:33:27] <Twelve> just do it like they do in those high school debate teams
[22:33:34] <Twelve> just one hickup and done
[22:33:49] <Carlisle> What, be socially awkward and a minority?
[22:33:53] <Carlisle> oh
#21
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[15:17:26] * Vlash_Kimer yawns
[15:19:51] * Sidakin][Vos throws a golf ball into Vlash's mouth
[15:20:11] * Vlash_Kimer cock
[15:20:22] <syn> cock?
[15:20:24] <Vlash_Kimer> *chocks
[15:20:42] <Sidakin][Vos> ...........
[15:20:47] * Vlash_Kimer (~dolittle2@SWC-IRC.C54E5EC8A37450.TR) Quit (Quit: )
[15:20:47] <Sidakin][Vos> its chokes*
[15:20:48] <syn> It's okay, that's my first thought when someone is getting something shoved in their mouth, too.
[15:20:49] <Sidakin][Vos> xD!!!!!!!!!
[15:20:56] <Sidakin][Vos> He got embrassed
#333
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[13:56:24] <Dwajon__Tuckcrac> Idoit
[13:56:47] * Dwajon__Tuckcrac stairs at the idiot
#306
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[20:01:45] <@Mikel> I put peanut butter on my brown sugar
[20:01:56] <@Mikel> but her name is Sholonda
[20:02:01] <Kilian> Oh my
#128
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[21:44:09] <Cherokee> james bond beat abraham lincoln at the box office
[21:44:22] <Cherokee> boy it was a bad week for republicans all around
--
[22:39:59] <Cherokee> steven speilberg's Lincoln is in theaters now
[22:40:06] <Cherokee> traditionally, not a good place for him
#108
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[07:46:47] <blackhole> i can't eat a whole pie in a day! it's like 50cmx50cm big
[07:51:55] <Cherokee> thats crazy , no one measures things in cm
[07:52:00] <Cherokee> how many inches is?
[07:56:50] <blackhole> not sure. inches are short enough to accumulate too much error
[07:56:57] <blackhole> but in cocks should be like 3
[07:57:04] <Syn> wait what
[07:58:08] <Cherokee> ..
[07:58:16] <Syn> cocks is now a unit of measurement
[07:58:27] <Cherokee> what's the cock length?!
[07:58:30] <blackhole> i work with what i have!
[07:58:42] <Cherokee> WHY ARE YOU MEASURING PIES WITH YOUR COCK
[07:58:53] <blackhole> i swear i tried to measure it with my inches but it looked inaccurate
[07:58:56] <Cherokee> PEOPLE HAVE TO EAT THAT
[07:58:58] <blackhole> haha
[07:59:04] <blackhole> i'm not measuring depth!
#210
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[22:44:21] <Mikel> Electronic Exercise 2-C: Proceeds and Such
[22:44:25] <Mikel> "and Such"!?!?
[22:44:31] <Mikel> the fuck kind of textbook is this
[22:44:37] <Mikel> "like, the law, or whatever"
#38
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[18:16:40] <Xavian> is self enslavery allowable?
[18:18:52] <£> That isn't even a word, let alone a question that's specific enough to be answerable. >: /
[18:24:35] <Xavian> you know what I mean :P
[18:24:41] <Xavian> can I enslave myself
[18:26:10] <Xavian> hmm
[18:30:35] <£> I have no idea what you mean.
[18:30:46] <Xavian> I mean
[18:30:49] <Xavian> Sell myself
[18:30:50] <Xavian> :D
[18:31:04] <£> It sounds more like a philosophical question than a tech support one.
[18:31:09] <£> Sell yourself in what way?
[18:31:15] <Xavian> like
[18:31:19] <Xavian> ok
[18:31:27] <Xavian> you know NPCs?
[18:31:30] <Xavian> like that
[18:31:37] <Xavian> but I cost money!
[18:31:43] <Xavian> its foolproof
[18:31:52] <Xavian> seriously though
[18:31:59] <Xavian> its hard to explain
[18:32:02] <Xavian> hmmm
[18:32:05] <Xavian> aha
[18:32:07] <Xavian> its like
[18:32:09] <Xavian> labour
[18:32:15] <Xavian> but they have to pay
[18:32:23] <Xavian> but it has rp options
[18:32:54] <£> So...you want a job.
#199
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[23:13:45] <Ten> well, I always say the macklemore the macklemerrier
#132
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[22:53:42] <Cherokee> if i had a dollar for every time someone called me ugly , id be broke because im perfect, lol later losers
[22:53:45] * Cherokee (tcherokee77@HULK) has left #swc-members
#385
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[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Typical Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Jedi
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Not Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Accidental racism my bad
#247
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[21:17:49] <TembreFell> my soda exploded, but with my quick reflexes I was able to contain it to my arms, shirt, pants, and the chair I was sitting on. Phew!
#448
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<Twelve> You have declined: Mad Manny
<Twelve> mad lad
<Manny> hi
<Anax> Hi
<Manny> not sure if I'min the rigth place but Im' having problems with my handle