Random

#113
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[01:35:25] <G`no> If the days comes when we all go to prison for downloading music 'illegally', I hope they seperate us by genre.
[02:22:59] <G`no> The first two guys thought SUperman was a bird or a plane... why the heck were they excited?
[02:48:48] <G`no> I;m going to district 9 and 3 quarters.
[16:49:25] <G`no> If you took all the Twilight fans and laid them end to end around the equator, a lot of them would drown, get run over, or eaten by lions, so it's a really good idea.
[17:45:39] <G`no> Whenever a bird craps on my car, I eat a plate of scrambled eggs on my porch to let them know what I'm capable of.
[21:59:04] <G`no> I hate it when I'm singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong
[00:06:37] <G`no> If you take a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back?
[00:06:43] <G`no> I NEED AN ANSWER MUCH FASTER!!!
[20:01:13] <G`no> i can't wait to go back to england and open a time capsule i buried when i was 10
[20:01:25] <G`no> i wanna see how big my puppy got
[20:13:30] <G`no> Ugh, I hate bragging about my financial status, but I have to say, my credit card company keeps calling me to tell me my balance is outstanding!
#445
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[17:18:07] <swcdiscord1> <Ho Ho Honest Jic> listen, I'm not going to drive across america to go to my godmothers house just whip out my dick in front of her dog for scale
#166
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[18:04:47] <mikel> What is the difference between a woman and a man
[18:04:50] <mikel> er
[18:04:55] <mikel> What is the difference between a wombat and a man
[18:04:58] <Thor> ...
#347
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[11:03] <@Twelve> It's hard to parse incoming tactical information when someone is reading you literotica featuring your mother
#9
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[16:16:08] <Keir> Post-vasectomy pain syndrome. This is a very rare condition (approximately 1 in 10,000) where you get some dropping of the testicles after surgery (a few millimeters not meters) and an associated chronic pain, like someone continually pulling on your testicles. If this happens your days of boxers shorts are over and you will need good, supportive underwear.
[16:16:09] <Keir> hot
[16:16:50] <Phryss> I like the second parenthetical.
[16:17:05] <Phryss> As though someone would expect his testicles to drop a number of meters.
[16:17:49] <Phryss> "Oh, don't mind that. My scrotum just drags along the floor behind me since my vasectomy. Sometimes I trip over it. >: /"
#380
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[00:28:28] <Loki> whoa whoa dont go spreading around to everyone that I'd fuck literally anyone
[00:29:11] <Kez> If you didnt want ppl thinking that then you shouldnt be showing up at swap meets with yours hands full of booty
[00:29:28] <Loki> I showed up with my hands almost empty, but then people kept putting things in them, like drinks, and their asses
[00:29:52] <Kez> I saw plenty of grabbing Syn
[00:29:55] <Kez> you little cheater
[00:30:04] <Loki> It's not cheating if I lie about it and pretend like it didn't happen
[00:30:27] <Kez> Man, that just hits every form of corruption and rules breaking this game has seen
[00:30:32] <Loki> I like to be efficient
#54
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[03:02:42] <Thirteen> the mosquito I whacked out of the sky with a sponge is drunk walking toward me
[03:03:08] <Thirteen> and no, that's not a fall out boy song title
#405
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[19:11:55] * Superman considers outing Syn
[19:15:34] <selatos> as what
[19:15:56] <selatos> a vampire? a homosexual? a tortured teenage soul?
[19:16:07] <selatos> a falleen?
[19:23:04] <Superman> even worse
[19:23:11] <Superman> a german speaker
#23
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[17:17:48] <Adam_Zad> "While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad."
#305
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[14:07:31] <.selatos> good news mikel
[14:07:36] * Ming (Ming@swc-irc.g50.hj7.njvhe5.IP) has joined #swc-members
[14:07:42] <.selatos> taint checking is a standard part of software development; you're clearly in the wrong profession
[14:08:03] * Ming (Ming@swc-irc.g50.hj7.njvhe5.IP) has left #swc-members ("")
#171
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[11:14:48] <Zhao> Good, Vey has approved tha tax changes
[11:14:51] <Zhao> We're on track!
[11:26:21] <Zhao> Trying to figure out how I want to notify people
[11:50:55] <Loki> I assume "surprise motherfuckers" is off the table?
[11:51:14] <Zhao> lol
#103
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[16:31] <Eldrwyn_D`Auvergne> big sadness face, engage
[16:31] <Eldrwyn_D`Auvergne> >: OOOOOO(
#76
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<Keir> I have enough terrorists and their families on my cellphone that I'm sure I'm on a watchlist myself somewhere.
<Dante> Impressive, though I'm not sure why you would want to have terrorists in your contacts.
<Daktal> I bet it impresses girls.
<Lisa_Dent> "Hey baby what's your number, I'll put it right beneath Muqtada al-Sadr. Yeah, we club, s'cool."
#110
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[10:21:03] <blackhole> man my last clorophorm date was awful
[10:59:59] <Cherokee> colored prom?
[11:00:17] <Cherokee> you took a black girl to her prom? Aren't you a little old for that?
[11:01:41] <blackhole> geez man, you're making it sound like if i colored her myself
#447
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<Cherokee> Ejaculation
<Cherokee> Love explosion on your face
<Cherokee> eat up, fridge empty
#94
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[21:37] <Squall_Chitose> I'm going to write a story about my Dong, Jenos.
[21:37] <Quetzalxochitl> you called your dong jenos?
[21:37] <%Jenos-Laptop> :P
[21:37] <Guinar> Short story, right?
[21:37] <%Jenos-Laptop> bastards
#108
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[07:46:47] <blackhole> i can't eat a whole pie in a day! it's like 50cmx50cm big
[07:51:55] <Cherokee> thats crazy , no one measures things in cm
[07:52:00] <Cherokee> how many inches is?
[07:56:50] <blackhole> not sure. inches are short enough to accumulate too much error
[07:56:57] <blackhole> but in cocks should be like 3
[07:57:04] <Syn> wait what
[07:58:08] <Cherokee> ..
[07:58:16] <Syn> cocks is now a unit of measurement
[07:58:27] <Cherokee> what's the cock length?!
[07:58:30] <blackhole> i work with what i have!
[07:58:42] <Cherokee> WHY ARE YOU MEASURING PIES WITH YOUR COCK
[07:58:53] <blackhole> i swear i tried to measure it with my inches but it looked inaccurate
[07:58:56] <Cherokee> PEOPLE HAVE TO EAT THAT
[07:58:58] <blackhole> haha
[07:59:04] <blackhole> i'm not measuring depth!
#205
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[12:20:27] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> There isn't already a neon green skin. There was already a pink skin used by the smallest portion of the player base.
[12:21:01] <GEOFFREY> I don't recall ever seeing the pink one then.
[12:21:12] <GEOFFREY> Red, Black, Default Blue
[12:21:26] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> Green, grey, sith, and pink are the others
[12:21:32] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> And another blue I believe
[12:23:39] <MINTY_CREAM> two shades of gray, two shades of blue, two shades of green, two shades of red
[12:24:37] <LOKI|STARKPHONE> The highly unsuccessful sequel to 50 shades
#17
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[04:16:59] <Edward-Dalen> anyone know about the movement to redesign the keyboard?
[04:17:30] <Edward-Dalen> apparently qwerty is designed to make us type slow
[04:17:40] <Edward-Dalen> because it was designed for typewriters
[04:17:41] <Cypher_Diaz> convert to dvorak then ..
[04:17:44] <Edward-Dalen> that would jam
[04:17:58] <Vip_Fortuna> we need new words that do match better with the current keyboard setting.
[04:18:06] <Jaxom_Sky> ^
[04:18:12] <Jaxom_Sky> redesign words not the keyboard!
[04:18:15] <Cypher_Diaz> lol
[04:18:17] <Contabile_Quetzalxochitl> agreed
[04:18:20] <Cypher_Diaz> the obvious solution.
#60
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[02:08:57] <Barthol_Wred> hey, how do I whisper someone?
[02:09:05] <Ten> talk softly
[02:09:26] <Barthol_Wred> awww, thanks. I've been yelling at point blank range
[02:09:38] <Ten> a rookie mistake
#242
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[11:49:01] <Squall_Chitose> I asked my friend if his mom was a sewer....
[11:49:05] <Squall_Chitose> I meant somebody who sews.
#413
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[10:03:42] <Loki-cell> My phone informs me I'm driving right now.
[10:03:46] * Loki-cell sits motionless
[10:05:22] <Twelve> that's usually how it works when you're driving
[10:07:03] <Loki-cell> But I'm not moving at all! Except for how the planet is moving
[10:07:09] <Loki-cell> Like through space
[10:07:16] <Loki-cell> But relative to the planet I am motionless
[10:08:05] <Twelve> everyone looks like they're motionless when you zoom out far enough
#342
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[18:27:39] <%blackhole> that was some nice interracial homoerotic historical dream
[18:29:30] <DK> stop dreaming with hutts
[18:31:15] <%blackhole> it did take place in butt space
[18:33:13] <DK> :O
[18:33:19] <DK> Nal Butta?
[18:42:08] <%blackhole> 55 days at Nal Butta
[18:42:39] <%blackhole> it was a strange setting for a dream... i'm not even sure if i ever finished watching that (at pekin) movie
[18:42:59] <%blackhole> peking*
[18:50:08] <%blackhole> so anyway, the awkward moment was when i was exploring a black soldier's body for leechs in an oriental sauna in the middle of a desert town
[18:50:30] <Keth> well did you find any
[18:56:01] <%blackhole> yea! \o/
[18:56:23] <%blackhole> and i pretty much woke up there, which was sad
[18:56:31] <%blackhole> it was being a great adventure before the leeches check up
#99
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[01:55:59] <Squall_Chitose> I'd be like "Hey 16 year old slut, you want an A? You gotta earn it"
[01:56:08] <Squall_Chitose> thats why they won't let me be a teacher.
[01:56:12] <Selatos> "... by getting all of the answers correct on this test."
#150
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<|||Ashlyana|||> In California you can always find a party, in Soviet Russia, party can always find you.
#28
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[18:10:15] <Keir> If it's "sick" to chain your eldest daughter in the basement, tell your wife she ran away, then use her as a brood mother for you to raise speechless mutants underground, then I guess we're all a little "sick"
#350
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<@Thirteen> what about dre?
<Kilian_Delmarco> People act like they forgot about dre.
<PRE_Kynnovan> Who is Dre?
<@Thirteen> motherfucker, acting like you forgot about dre
<Kilian_Delmarco> Shame.
<@Thirteen> he's still the same OG, he's just been low key!
<PRE_Kynnovan> Well, in my defense I've only been around for 10 months
#79
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<Jacob_Jansen> Anyone up to the task of writing up some IU history for me?
<King_Tylger> One day Vodo was like "Ohai, Hapes. SSD for your loyalty." Hapes goes "Lolz, k." Then other people thought were like "Free shit!" and joined. The End.
#126
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[18:12:50] <Gav> My cat smelt something
[18:14:02] <Cyan> your cat can't work a forge!
#450
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[12:42:17] <@ArjunAway> how can I be hot and cold at the same time?
[12:42:23] <@ArjunAway> I'm shivering and sweating
[12:42:41] <@Sid> Meth is a hell of a drug
#105
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[19:07:24] <Cherokee> 7:30 WHY SO LATE FINAL
[19:07:33] <Syn> no clue
[19:07:40] <Syn> it's scheduled for 8pm for some reason
[19:07:43] <Syn> I miss raid for it ]:
[19:07:43] <Syn> so rude
[19:07:57] <Cherokee> you like only one invited, and its in professor's office and he gave you key and you find candles lit and rose petals
[19:08:04] <Syn> hahaha
[19:08:06] <Syn> creepy
[19:08:09] <Cherokee> totally
[19:08:14] <Cherokee> that only happen to me once
[19:08:20] <Cherokee> easiest A i ever got
#153
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[16:38:42] <Mikel> People seem to get pissed when you blow up a planet with a death star, for some reason.
[16:40:24] <Tarrok> Not the people on the planet you've blown up.
[16:40:33] <Tarrok> I think the solution is evident.
#44
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[03:17:23] <Light> That's pretty much my favorite part of SWC. Something completely insignificant and random occurs and e-people start psychologically profiling you.
[03:17:46] <Pozz> it's phrases like that that get you branded a corpse-banger
[03:17:48] <Sleek> yeah, i agree with the rapist
#117
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<Mikel> Anyone happen to be selling 12 sets of IRG?
<Mikel> or am I going to have to steal them from wherever I assume we're storing like 5000 sets
* Mikel eyeshifts.
<Ellias> you mean you don't steal your factions equipment ofr personal use?
<Ellias> waste of powers if you ask me
<Mikel> Seele would probably get mad and spank me
<Mikel> related: the NPC fit out I'm creating is stupidly complicated
<Mikel> IRG armor needs a belt
<Mikel> otherwise my NPCs will be mismatched
<Mikel> and that would be a FASHION DISASTER
<Mikel> bandits would be talking shit about me on Bravo
<Mikel> "Did you see that bitch? Had the NERVE to come up on our camp in his last-season Imperial Munitions shit. Amateur."
#120
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[11:01:07] <Paparrin> i turn ac on and it makes like eeeeeeeeeek for 2 blocks, then quiet down and oh boy. is heaven
#73
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[03:44] <Bryce> so....tell me about your character?
[03:44] <tycho> im sexy
[03:45] <Bryce> ok...tell me things that my character would know by meeting you.
[03:45] <tycho> im sexy
#107
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[13:40:47] <blackhole> still, it would be cool to be up to the communication level :p
[14:00:00] <blackhole> hehe, drunken labia wrong, drunken loquacity right
[14:00:07] <Syn> ..
[14:00:07] <blackhole> it's good i use the dictionary sometimes before saying something
[14:00:40] <blackhole> i assumed labia refered to the lips like in spanish
[14:00:48] <Syn> hahaha
[14:00:54] <blackhole> as used to mean verbosity when talking
[14:01:02] <blackhole> but no
[14:01:52] * blackhole removes "prayse my huge drunken labia" from his fb status >.<
#244
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[11:54:02] <Deric_Adams> who else is playing?
[11:56:57] * Kelmanis_Vaan (Kelmanis@super.soldier) has joined #SWC-Members
[11:57:09] <Clark_Kent> Uh
[11:57:15] <Clark_Kent> Me and three random dudes
[11:57:22] <Kelmanis_Vaan> Go on.
[11:57:34] <Kelmanis_Vaan> Is this a story or request?
#432
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[23:07:59] <Loki> Alternate between swiveling both wrists in opposite directions and stroking your hands upward, twisting your wrists when you reach his head as though you are turning a doorknob. Rub your thumb in a tiny figure-eight pattern over his frenelum... Or try the windshield-wiper move; glide your thumb from side to side along the rim where his head begins, then move your thumb up and over the top of the head several times.
[23:08:14] <Loki> yeah im gonna need a diagram here
[23:08:19] <Russ> That is a lot of detail
[23:08:20] <Twelve> yes, turn that doorknob
[23:08:29] <Russ> Either you are copying this straight or you have attempted this
[23:08:57] <Loki> I'm sitting here with my hands making motions that are disappointingly not obscene but look like I'm trying to summon a demon
[23:09:41] <Russ> And you're not getting anything out of this?
[23:09:55] <Loki> Not even a lesser demon
#20
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[22:23:21] <blackhole> i think i'm gonna stop drinking one way or another some time soon
[22:32:20] <blackhole> gonna give it a try this oct
[22:32:51] <blackhole> if i stay sober for more than 2 months you owe me a beer
#45
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[12:49:29] <Kevin> Man, weekends are pretty popular for piracy, huh?
[12:49:40] <Kevin> Demonoid and TPB seem to both be overloaded
[12:49:46] <Arthur> IC Piracy or bittorrent piracy?
[12:49:48] <Arthur> oh
[12:50:11] <Kevin> I think we all engage in some boat theft over the weekend, that's a given
#63
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[02:25:42] <Ten> The noise which my neighbours possibly mistook for a dog in the apartment is just the looping tape I have of dogs barking which I play at high volume while I am at work to deter potential burglars from breaking in and stealing my tupperware.
#340
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[21:23:02] <%Lan> Everytime I write a line of code
[21:25:12] <&selatos> do you think about whether i would judge you for it?
[21:28:31] <%Lan> Yes :'(
[21:28:45] <&selatos> perfect :p
#403
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[18:03:06] <@Superman> I regularly regret letting people know I have freetime within moments of hitting send
[18:03:57] <.selatos> oh perfect you have some free time
[18:04:05] <.selatos> i need you to collate 1000 information packets for this business meeting
[18:04:13] <.selatos> they're in a heap, in random order, in the copy room
[18:05:28] <@Superman> do I get CPs?
[18:05:55] <.selatos> sure same amount as i pay for everything else you do
[18:07:07] <@Superman> ...touché...
#370
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[19:06:04] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:06] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:14] <ETJ> We did it out of order.
[19:06:15] <ETJ> Try again.
[19:06:17] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:25] <Loki> yeah but they go bad so quickly
[19:06:38] <ETJ> You're out of phase.
[19:06:40] <Loki> oops
[19:06:42] <ETJ> Your time machine broke
[19:06:45] <ETJ> Lets do this again
[19:06:47] <Loki> write that down for a few days from now
[19:06:47] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:51] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:55] <ETJ> Damn.
#424
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<Loki> I put my pants on like anybody else: when I absolutely have to and not always then
#226
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[16:11:12] <Chermobyl> Don't spray like an anal.
[16:11:13] <Chermobyl> ...
[16:11:13] <Selatos> you're basically a nighttime prowler though
[16:11:15] <Chermobyl> Animal
[16:11:19] <blackhole> haha
[16:11:23] <Minty_Cream> don't spray like an anal either though
[16:11:33] <blackhole> please, spray like an anal
[16:12:09] <Loki-> Fuck you all for making me laugh in a dead silent room filled with people
[16:12:09] <Chermobyl> You can't handle the poop
[16:12:09] <blackhole> hahaha
[16:12:24] <Clark_Kent> Hahaha
[16:12:49] <Minty_Cream> keep us updated as the situation develops
#97
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[16:15:10] <Quetzalxochitl> 17. The idea of verbally dominating/humiliating (name calling, dictating orders, etc.) during sexual activity is exciting to me
[16:15:31] <Quetzalxochitl> sure, but I always hit a writer's block after the first "you like it, slut"
[16:16:10] <Quetzalxochitl> GIMME ALL YO YENS YIP YIP YAP
#29
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[19:03:30] <blackhole> i heard so many wonderful stories about everywhere-butspain conn
[19:03:46] <blackhole> buttspain
[19:03:52] <blackhole> ah nm hehe
#61
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[01:35:22] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) has joined #swc-members
[01:35:45] <Cherokee> No.
[01:35:47] <Cherokee> Get out.
[01:38:17] * Rick_Unnis (Rick_Unnis@SWC-IRC.28D46D33E3A7E2.SWC) Quit (Quit: )
[01:38:46] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) Quit (Quit: * Goran_Skirata is now away - Reason : Squall has an unhealthy and disconcerting interest in me)
[01:40:28] * Vussek_Kaos (~vussek@SWC-IRC.E4B5D168BCDB9.SWC) Quit (Quit: <.Gavin> somewhere there is a 1 armed man who is beatin off with one hand, and using his nose to type and surf the sites)
[01:40:35] * Geno (~Geno@SWC-IRC.635C21F8A454C.SWC) Quit (Ping timeout)
[01:41:06] <Cherokee> I didn't mean all of them, just Squall.