Worst

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#381
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[12:34:41] <@Thirteen> fetishism of turdkin is problematic
#147
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[12:46:00] <+Samuel_York> I downloaded a movie for my dad, 28 weeks later, and he's complaining that the captions are in French
[12:47:19] <+Hal_Kinda_Away> Bonjour. Je m'appelle Zombie. Vous est petit dejeuner, oui?
[12:47:40] <Ji`vani> Cerveaux! Cerveaux!
#434
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<@Klinger> It took me half the day to get those RM's back to that person :P
<.selatos> not bad
<@Klinger> It would have taken me less if I knew I could just spawn them :P
<@Baugrems> What were you doing? Mining for it
<@Baugrems> ??
<@Sidway> He purchased them from DEEPCORE
<@Sidway> And then flew them all the way back in his hyper 10 Acclamator
#146
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[23:16:15] <Banquo> I'll pretend to be a Tylger.
[23:18:32] <Banquo> Seriously, you come out blasting, and I'll smoke a cigar and act like I'm rich.
#403
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[18:03:06] <@Superman> I regularly regret letting people know I have freetime within moments of hitting send
[18:03:57] <.selatos> oh perfect you have some free time
[18:04:05] <.selatos> i need you to collate 1000 information packets for this business meeting
[18:04:13] <.selatos> they're in a heap, in random order, in the copy room
[18:05:28] <@Superman> do I get CPs?
[18:05:55] <.selatos> sure same amount as i pay for everything else you do
[18:07:07] <@Superman> ...touché...
#11
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[19:13:21] <Phryss> Does anyone else get really paranoid when you email people that you have never emailed before? I always fear getting marked as spam, so I end up writing really weird emails that don't include any URL and that read funny in an attempt not to sound like a spambot.
#13
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[00:01:01] <Keir> I was hanging out with a bunch of tough black thugs, and I was trying to fit in and be one of them, but I was really nervous and when I tried to call them "mai homies", I think I said homos :(
[00:01:13] <Keir> I'm now in a bodycast
[00:01:44] <Keir> For those who couldn't tell, the above story was an obvious fabrication. It is a well-known fact Canada doesn't have black people.
#16
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[18:15:32] <Phryss> I use HTML as a masturbatory aid.
#19
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[18:35:12] <Keir|Spying> "I gots me a watermelon" is not *bad* English, it is *alternative* English
#28
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[18:10:15] <Keir> If it's "sick" to chain your eldest daughter in the basement, tell your wife she ran away, then use her as a brood mother for you to raise speechless mutants underground, then I guess we're all a little "sick"
#32
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[23:43:27] * Naast has learned to stop clicking Keir's links now
[23:44:51] <Samuel_Flagg> I think I learned to not click on Keirs pictures back in about '02?
[23:45:31] <Keir> pfft, the hate
[23:45:38] <Meesis_Meeso> of???
[23:45:55] <Keir> fecal matter molded into interesting shapes with cookie cutters, in Flagg's case
#47
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[03:47:59] <Nash> howd the interview go?
[03:48:07] <Aikinar|> Good actually :D
[03:48:58] <Aikinar|> I was not so nervous as i would have thought
[03:50:03] <Ten> or maybe you didn't notice your own nervousness
[03:50:12] <Aikinar|> nah, i know when i'm nervous
[03:50:34] <Aikinar|> and i didn't sweat as a pig :D
[03:54:26] <Ten> maybe you were so nervous that your body couldn't even sweat!
[03:59:40] <Nash> have you checked your pants yet? Like make sure instead of sweating, you didn't accidentally soil yourself and the interview only went well because the interviewer felt he was in the presense of an unstable individual?
#49
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[20:10:43] <Cherokee> Melik, does your fiancee know about your swine clap?
[20:11:09] <Squall_Chitose> I have bovine chlamydia.
[20:15:37] <Melik_Tafari> no but you can suck your mother and find out if she has it
[20:16:06] <Cherokee> that makes no sense
[20:17:09] <Melik_Tafari> in deh islands where i live, it would be said as "suck ur mumma ras hole"... is that better?
[20:21:02] <Cherokee> no, but if you're implying my mother has pet rats in holes in the wall, its quite true. We keep them there to deter visitors who want to use the guest room, exercise room, home theater, game room, great room, captains roost, or poolside cabana deck.
#333
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[13:56:24] <Dwajon__Tuckcrac> Idoit
[13:56:47] * Dwajon__Tuckcrac stairs at the idiot
#400
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< blackhole> i don't even know what the avian flu feels like because the separatist catalonains are keeping it all for themselves
#409
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[10:57:42] <Baugrems> Kay you just shattered my view of your perfection and robotic nature
[10:58:04] <+Kay_Dallben> Oh that explains why you kept trying to cyber with me - you thought I was a robot.
#339
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[09:20:02] <Dante_Erinith> Also, there usually so few people on IRC this time of the day? I remember there being a hell of a lot more a few years ago.
[09:20:29] <.selatos> Current Local Users: 182 Max: 312
[09:20:29] <.selatos> Current Global Users: 190 Max: 320
[09:20:40] <@Thirteen> irc was more active a few years ago
[09:20:44] <.selatos> i suppose it is a bit lower than max, but mostly people just don't like -members
[09:20:53] <.selatos> because of ten, mostly
[09:20:59] * .selatos stares
[09:21:01] <Dante_Erinith> Damn ten.
[09:21:02] <Dante_Erinith> Who's ten?
[09:21:15] <@Thirteen> he goes by Loki nowadays
[09:21:21] * @Thirteen stares
[09:21:22] <Dante_Erinith> Damn ten.
[09:21:25] * Dante_Erinith stares
#340
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[21:23:02] <%Lan> Everytime I write a line of code
[21:25:12] <&selatos> do you think about whether i would judge you for it?
[21:28:31] <%Lan> Yes :'(
[21:28:45] <&selatos> perfect :p
#94
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[21:37] <Squall_Chitose> I'm going to write a story about my Dong, Jenos.
[21:37] <Quetzalxochitl> you called your dong jenos?
[21:37] <%Jenos-Laptop> :P
[21:37] <Guinar> Short story, right?
[21:37] <%Jenos-Laptop> bastards
#145
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[17:22:20] <+Kevin||Sleep> I type with my penis
[17:22:33] <@Banquo> In other words, he can barely reach the keyboard.
#71
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[02:36] <Cherokee> I don't go to the beach anymore. Not since the last time they succeeded in "rescuing" me by pushing me into the water.
[02:37] <Nalah> Who are they?
[02:37] <Seele> Greenpeace.
#78
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[21:43:58] <Cherokee[worb]> That's right. I take steroids. It's not for muscles. It's just to shrink my testicles to a manageable size.
#15
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[17:44:06] * Cherokee[p] puts on his dress uniform and goes to the bingo hall
[17:44:36] <Cherokee[p]> I'm so lonely
[17:44:39] * Cherokee[p] sniffs
[17:44:46] * Cherokee[p] dabs as numbers are called
[17:44:58] <syn> You could hire Jackson for company
[17:45:11] <syn> He'd look a dashing trophy wife on your arm
[17:45:19] <Cherokee[p]> Tempting.
[17:45:37] <tgr316> I dont wear underwear. That way, you can tell when I poo
[17:45:43] <syn> I rescind my remark.
[17:45:55] <Cherokee[p]> Not as tempting any longer.
#39
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[21:23:43] <Cherokee> In addition to wooden shoes, the Netherlands is also famous for their wooden socks.
#306
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[20:01:45] <@Mikel> I put peanut butter on my brown sugar
[20:01:56] <@Mikel> but her name is Sholonda
[20:02:01] <Kilian> Oh my
#62
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[04:19:28] <Guinar> Claim you have to visit South Dakota on a matter of national security?
[04:19:32] <Light> haha
[04:19:39] <Light> Who visits SD?!
[04:19:43] <Light> especially for national security!
[04:19:45] <Cherokee> Only the dutch.
[04:19:49] <Guinar> Indeed.
[04:20:01] <Guinar> When they're not frothing at the mouth.
[04:20:12] <Cherokee> They're so impressed that we have land above sea level that we don't want to live on, that they just have to see what's wrong with it for themselves.
#326
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<Minty_Cream> : clearly
<Minty_Cream> : anyone can post about books in general talk
<Minty_Cream> : AND THEY CAME EN MASSE
<Minty_Cream> : if you build it they will come, indeed
<Sadatsu> : I knew a girl who came in Mass once. It was....awkward.
#85
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[08:46:29:429] <SWC_Member380> dont trip on me im new finding clues ok think lady left clues for me followed cookie crum no im here if your here im here thinking hoo dont no th i now a lady in this leage ssskkk in time only can sa you been a showdow one my ass fill its a girl not in to men so if you like games im down still like it if you say ha whats up if friends no someing let her no if this sounds lioke some one you have herd about please
#342
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[18:27:39] <%blackhole> that was some nice interracial homoerotic historical dream
[18:29:30] <DK> stop dreaming with hutts
[18:31:15] <%blackhole> it did take place in butt space
[18:33:13] <DK> :O
[18:33:19] <DK> Nal Butta?
[18:42:08] <%blackhole> 55 days at Nal Butta
[18:42:39] <%blackhole> it was a strange setting for a dream... i'm not even sure if i ever finished watching that (at pekin) movie
[18:42:59] <%blackhole> peking*
[18:50:08] <%blackhole> so anyway, the awkward moment was when i was exploring a black soldier's body for leechs in an oriental sauna in the middle of a desert town
[18:50:30] <Keth> well did you find any
[18:56:01] <%blackhole> yea! \o/
[18:56:23] <%blackhole> and i pretty much woke up there, which was sad
[18:56:31] <%blackhole> it was being a great adventure before the leeches check up
#103
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[16:31] <Eldrwyn_D`Auvergne> big sadness face, engage
[16:31] <Eldrwyn_D`Auvergne> >: OOOOOO(
#395
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< blackhole> iirc, simplified chinese appears too simplified, though... like empty boxes
#163
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<Guinar> Only you would bring a penis to a car fight, Squall.
#14
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[23:50:43] <Phryss> My family has this odd habit of not distinguishing between inlaws and...outlaws.
#22
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[13:22:27] <Bryce> If we break up, I am going to look for something more then 2 boobs and a vagina next time.
[13:23:02] <Togan> like what, three boobs and two vaginas?
#73
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[03:44] <Bryce> so....tell me about your character?
[03:44] <tycho> im sexy
[03:45] <Bryce> ok...tell me things that my character would know by meeting you.
[03:45] <tycho> im sexy
#84
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[23:02] <Clarr> I do, but first admit you're talking out of your ass
[23:02] <Clarr> go on, I'm waiting
[23:02] <Bane> Is that physically possible?
[23:03] <Keir> I admit that I am talking out of my ass, though it seems my ass has outwitted you
#105
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[19:07:24] <Cherokee> 7:30 WHY SO LATE FINAL
[19:07:33] <Syn> no clue
[19:07:40] <Syn> it's scheduled for 8pm for some reason
[19:07:43] <Syn> I miss raid for it ]:
[19:07:43] <Syn> so rude
[19:07:57] <Cherokee> you like only one invited, and its in professor's office and he gave you key and you find candles lit and rose petals
[19:08:04] <Syn> hahaha
[19:08:06] <Syn> creepy
[19:08:09] <Cherokee> totally
[19:08:14] <Cherokee> that only happen to me once
[19:08:20] <Cherokee> easiest A i ever got
#117
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<Mikel> Anyone happen to be selling 12 sets of IRG?
<Mikel> or am I going to have to steal them from wherever I assume we're storing like 5000 sets
* Mikel eyeshifts.
<Ellias> you mean you don't steal your factions equipment ofr personal use?
<Ellias> waste of powers if you ask me
<Mikel> Seele would probably get mad and spank me
<Mikel> related: the NPC fit out I'm creating is stupidly complicated
<Mikel> IRG armor needs a belt
<Mikel> otherwise my NPCs will be mismatched
<Mikel> and that would be a FASHION DISASTER
<Mikel> bandits would be talking shit about me on Bravo
<Mikel> "Did you see that bitch? Had the NERVE to come up on our camp in his last-season Imperial Munitions shit. Amateur."
#175
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[15:22:05] <Dac> oh I cant type but if you like that better then smootciekins we can run with it
[15:23:42] * Quits: Dac (Dac@swc-irc.5af.m34.j8fubj.IP) (Connection closed)
[15:23:54] <.Loki|starkphone> Dad I will definitely take the pet name loke over smoochiekins
#214
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[00:38:58] <blackhole> good news everyone. i can communicate with my cat via morse farting
#252
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[23:07:47] <Keth> beating the emu sounds like it would be australian slang for jacking off
#37
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[02:11:30] <JackTLadd> So catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, catch the fishie, Howww?
[02:11:30] <JackTLadd> nab him! jab him! tab him! grag him! catch that fishie now!
[02:12:01] * Admiral_Ackmin scatters
#305
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[14:07:31] <.selatos> good news mikel
[14:07:36] * Ming (Ming@swc-irc.g50.hj7.njvhe5.IP) has joined #swc-members
[14:07:42] <.selatos> taint checking is a standard part of software development; you're clearly in the wrong profession
[14:08:03] * Ming (Ming@swc-irc.g50.hj7.njvhe5.IP) has left #swc-members ("")
#75
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[01:32] <.Keir|Away> Hint: Never let your planets go uncontrolled, even for ten hours, when Keir is in-sector with a hyper 14 ship
[01:32] * .Keir|Away eyes faction about to lose two planets to hidden cities :D
[01:38] <+T`losk|Away> zomgish. :O
[01:53] <+Orphaea_Imperium> not any of mine? >_>
[01:55] * .Keir|Away waves, smirking at Orph
[01:55] <+Orphaea_Imperium> you go hell
[01:55] <+Orphaea_Imperium> >:/
[01:55] <+Orphaea_Imperium> although I only have one planet...
[01:56] <.Keir|Away> Did it go uncontrolled recently?
[01:56] <+Orphaea_Imperium> recent-ish
[01:56] <+Orphaea_Imperium> for about ten hours
[01:56] <+Orphaea_Imperium> >_>
#92
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[13:18] <Light> oh, and don't handle jalapeno peppers then touch your asshole.
[13:19] <Crog> why
[13:19] <Light> it hurts
[13:19] <Crog> why
[13:19] <Squall_Chitose> BURNS SO BAD
[13:19] <Teyacapan> yes, don't handle peppers with your asshole
#102
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[10:31:33] <Cherokee> I've eaten 14 boxes of Thin Mints...
[10:31:39] <Cherokee> but I haven't gotten any thinner :(
#31
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[20:22:21] <Citus_Navitas> Thank god for this conversation. I woke up this morning and just starting thinking "Man, I havent seen like 40 pictures of homoerotic statues today. What kind of life am I living?"
#35
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[23:16:55] <Wool> just dropped my container with all the cashews in it
[23:17:06] <Wool> now I've got bits and pieces of cashews all over the floor :(
[23:17:09] <Keir> for the last fucking time, pick your nuts up off the ground
#294
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[14:39:12] <blackhole> well, i was almost eaten by a grua if that counts
[14:39:27] <blackhole> but i guess i should add grua means crane
[14:39:35] <.selatos> the bird or the construction vehicle
[14:40:01] <blackhole> construction
[14:40:08] <blackhole> i always preemptively hide from birds
#65
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[01:30:04] <Wool> And one morning I woke up with so much blood in my mouth I thought I went down on a vampire.

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