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#441
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[08:42:14] <Kez> this bot is like the greatest relevent fox provider I've ever seen
[08:43:02] <Lokitty> How many relevant fox providers have you seen, kez?
[08:43:09] <Lokitty> Because I feel that might be a low bar
[08:43:20] <Kez> I drink to forget the former fox providers
[08:43:33] <Kez> Highly let down by the misleading Fox News
[08:43:41] <Kez> barely provides any foxes!
[08:43:50] <Lokitty> Ah that was your first mistake, expecting fox news to provide you with foxes, or news
#93
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[17:10:51] <Crog> now make sound when you pooping , like TATATATATATa
#95
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[07:56] <&Zhao> Morning Vey
[07:59] <&Jesfa> , the australian said aloud.
[08:03] <&Zhao> ...stop narrating my life!
[08:04] <&Jesfa> , he mumbled angrily under his breath.
[08:05] <&Zhao> .......
[08:05] <&Jesfa> The australian, so stupid as he was, was incapable of forming words.
#370
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[19:06:04] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:06] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:14] <ETJ> We did it out of order.
[19:06:15] <ETJ> Try again.
[19:06:17] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:25] <Loki> yeah but they go bad so quickly
[19:06:38] <ETJ> You're out of phase.
[19:06:40] <Loki> oops
[19:06:42] <ETJ> Your time machine broke
[19:06:45] <ETJ> Lets do this again
[19:06:47] <Loki> write that down for a few days from now
[19:06:47] <ETJ> How fast can you talk german.
[19:06:51] <Loki> I dont know
[19:06:55] <ETJ> Damn.
#410
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<@Loki-cell> She only plays AI mode in heroes of the storm so she's not worth my time
#295
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[17:09:55] <Keth> So you're saying that there are currently no laws in elysia?
[17:10:24] <Loki|Arrow> well it's called elysia for a reason, of course there are no laws
[17:10:36] <Dagaro> But it has a King?
[17:10:43] <Loki|Arrow> i didn't vote for him
[17:11:01] <Dagaro> He was chosen by the Lady of the Maw
[17:11:27] <Rev[a]n> Some fancy tart throwing swords out a blackhole is no basis for a government
#337
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[13:25:42] <Altair> and grammatically its good nuff?
[13:25:55] <@Ten> depends on what you consider good enough
[13:26:26] <Altair> I spelled enough as nuff.
#91
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[14:16:05] <Panda_Prime> We only converse breifly and in short bursts! That's not knowing someone!
[14:16:36] <Ten> that's the internet equivalent of having shared a bed!
#124
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[04:15:29] <dot> Captcha read "How are you" and I typed good >_<
#129
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[10:46:31] <Selatos> D: doctor's office was uncomfortable, but productive i suppose
[10:48:06] <Selatos> two words: prostate exam
[10:48:16] <Selatos> maybe three, surprise prostate exam
#226
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[16:11:12] <Chermobyl> Don't spray like an anal.
[16:11:13] <Chermobyl> ...
[16:11:13] <Selatos> you're basically a nighttime prowler though
[16:11:15] <Chermobyl> Animal
[16:11:19] <blackhole> haha
[16:11:23] <Minty_Cream> don't spray like an anal either though
[16:11:33] <blackhole> please, spray like an anal
[16:12:09] <Loki-> Fuck you all for making me laugh in a dead silent room filled with people
[16:12:09] <Chermobyl> You can't handle the poop
[16:12:09] <blackhole> hahaha
[16:12:24] <Clark_Kent> Hahaha
[16:12:49] <Minty_Cream> keep us updated as the situation develops
#6
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[17:32:25] <Jerev> Million Man March!
[17:32:33] * Nalah (Nalah@SWC-IRC.454356B93E278.SWC) Quit (Ping timeout)
[17:33:37] <Jerev> How come everytime I say something, someone leaves?
[17:34:08] * Ed|uni (~Ed@SWC-IRC.AFDE1B3B8D90.SWC) Quit (Quit: ~ <RobertDerr> Az, I'm going to try to dock in you | Can't beat a good whack :P ~)
[17:36:47] <Jerev> Owned!
[17:36:55] * Cherokee (~tcherokee@SWC-IRC.BE173B7E3EF991.SWC) Quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
[17:37:01] <Jerev> Dammit!!
#23
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[17:17:48] <Adam_Zad> "While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad."
#30
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[15:43:05] <Laz|away> and by the way, what prompted this war in the first place?
[15:44:43] <Keir> Frezt's refusal to sign a treaty and grant Eidola one planet in Kathol space
[15:45:23] <Laz|away> and what did you need a planet in Kathol space for?
[15:45:57] <Keir> raising tauntauns
[15:46:57] <Laz|away> wouldn't one normally do that on Hoth.....in Churba?
[15:47:33] <Keir> We capture them in Hoth, and raise them in Kathol
[15:47:41] <Laz|away> and what happened to that story of a bridge between your territories?
[15:47:53] <Keir> lies concocted by our enemies to discredit us
[15:47:59] <Keir> we are simple tauntaun farmers
#40
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[13:45:43] <Kevin> How cold does it generally get there in the winter?
[13:45:54] <Skye_Varn> -20 to -30 up here
[13:46:12] <Skye_Varn> -35 if you're really lucky
[13:46:39] <Kevin> I used to live in New York, and it would easily get to single digits F with no wind chill during the winter
[13:46:50] <Ten> we're not talking F!
[13:46:53] <Kevin> So?
[13:46:55] <Skye_Varn> We're talking C
[13:47:01] <Ten> so you can F off
#61
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[01:35:22] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) has joined #swc-members
[01:35:45] <Cherokee> No.
[01:35:47] <Cherokee> Get out.
[01:38:17] * Rick_Unnis (Rick_Unnis@SWC-IRC.28D46D33E3A7E2.SWC) Quit (Quit: )
[01:38:46] * Squall_Chitose (~jedimaste@SWC-IRC.2930AC62555A87.SWC) Quit (Quit: * Goran_Skirata is now away - Reason : Squall has an unhealthy and disconcerting interest in me)
[01:40:28] * Vussek_Kaos (~vussek@SWC-IRC.E4B5D168BCDB9.SWC) Quit (Quit: <.Gavin> somewhere there is a 1 armed man who is beatin off with one hand, and using his nose to type and surf the sites)
[01:40:35] * Geno (~Geno@SWC-IRC.635C21F8A454C.SWC) Quit (Ping timeout)
[01:41:06] <Cherokee> I didn't mean all of them, just Squall.
#399
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[19:34:01] <Arjuna> Genital jousting is on sale, and my grandma gave me a card for christmas with steam wallet money
[19:34:12] <Arjuna> I... think she just bought me this game....
#190
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[10:39:33] <Luke_Whitelock> you said park not me
[10:39:40] <Loki> If I can drive 2 hours you can walk 10 minutes.
[10:40:16] <Luke_Whitelock> I can't go into town that why I said here
[10:40:33] <Loki> ..Why not?
[10:40:39] <Squall_Chitose> Your mommy won't let you leave?
[10:40:40] <Varlathotep> Because his family that surprised him is there!
[10:40:44] <Varlathotep> Pay attention Loki!
[10:40:47] <Ten> gps anklet tracker
[10:40:48] <Luke_Whitelock> last time I did I was close to being hit by a truck
[10:40:53] <Ten> ...
[10:40:56] <Loki> hahah
[10:41:10] <Ten> and there was a black cat
[10:41:15] <Ten> and it rained
[10:41:32] <Luke_Whitelock> they were on the side walk
[10:41:40] <Loki> oh no now you can never go on the sidewalk again
[10:42:06] <Luke_Whitelock> yes so I can't go into town
[10:42:11] <Loki> not ever again
[10:42:14] <Loki> you're stuck inside forever
[10:42:23] <Luke_Whitelock> yes
[10:42:26] <Ten> he can go in the yard
[10:42:28] <Ten> no trucks there
[10:42:32] <Varlathotep> You never know.
[10:42:38] <Varlathotep> Those fire engines are wild man.
[10:42:52] <Loki> man its a good thing you live in the middle of nowhere so you can hide from all of the scary things in the world like people and cars and sunlight
[10:43:04] <Loki> and very small rocks
[10:47:11] <Luke_Whitelock> just because you like to be hit by cars don't mean I want to
[10:47:32] <Loki> I have eyes, so like, usually I look at the street to make sure I'm not stepping in front of one
[10:47:35] <Loki> maybe you should try that
[10:47:51] <Loki> life advice right here, cars are not ants, you can actually see them coming
[10:48:10] <Luke_Whitelock> I don't walk on the road loki
[10:48:16] <Loki> You dont walk at all from the sounds of it
[10:48:22] <Squall_Chitose> Dude, even chickens cross the road.
#33
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[15:34:12] <Keir> The most trusted name in violence is now the most trusted name in banking! Eidola investments offers you a guaranteed 400% profit on your investments through one of our dedicated branch managers. Speak to us today, to ensure a brighter future!
[15:34:34] <Cesodevo> ...
[15:34:56] * Keir is now known as Person_in_Crowd
[15:35:01] <Person_in_Crowd> "Hey, these guys look legit!"
#63
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[02:25:42] <Ten> The noise which my neighbours possibly mistook for a dog in the apartment is just the looping tape I have of dogs barking which I play at high volume while I am at work to deter potential burglars from breaking in and stealing my tupperware.
#80
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[11:14] <@Dac_Kain> I paid for a bribe once, 7 days later I got a mail order russian lady at my door. Boy do I need glasses
#89
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[14:53:00] <Cherokee> i bit myself in a retarded way now there is a piece of meat hanging from my mouth
#97
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[16:15:10] <Quetzalxochitl> 17. The idea of verbally dominating/humiliating (name calling, dictating orders, etc.) during sexual activity is exciting to me
[16:15:31] <Quetzalxochitl> sure, but I always hit a writer's block after the first "you like it, slut"
[16:16:10] <Quetzalxochitl> GIMME ALL YO YENS YIP YIP YAP
#385
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[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Typical Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Jedi
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Not Jewish
[22:19] <.Loki-cell> Accidental racism my bad
#132
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[22:53:42] <Cherokee> if i had a dollar for every time someone called me ugly , id be broke because im perfect, lol later losers
[22:53:45] * Cherokee (tcherokee77@HULK) has left #swc-members
#169
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[16:24:13] <minty_sadness> this is bullshit
[16:24:37] <minty_sadness> if you can't launch bottle rockets from someone's anus then what's the fucking point of pledging to a fraternity?
#50
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[15:41:32] <Thirteen> well, I skipped my chemical romance
[15:42:42] <Jenos> Skipping's for girls or boxers. Are you a girl or a boxer?
[15:42:57] <Mikel> I wear boxers, does that count?
[15:43:01] <Light> Only if you're a girl.
[15:43:06] <Thirteen> I dated a girl boxer once
[15:43:13] <Light> Like, a female dog?
[15:43:23] <Thirteen> no, like a human female that boxes
[15:43:34] <Jenos> worked in a warehouse?
#68
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[03:15:03] <Ten> I just realized something strange
[03:15:19] <DvD> You DONT have a vachina?
[03:15:30] <Ten> I don't know what a vachina is
[03:15:37] <Ten> so, probably not that
[03:16:00] <Ten> no, I just woke up to the realization that I've been talking out loud to my computer in a transformers voice
[03:17:59] <Ten> where did everyone go?!
[03:18:38] <Light> I went to poop
[03:19:20] <dorothy> I was smoking
[03:19:35] <Ten> phew
[03:19:44] <Ten> for a moment it was like my fourth birthday all over again
[03:19:52] <dorothy> lol
[03:20:08] <DvD> lol
[03:20:42] <Ten> we were playing hide and seek, my family, class mates, house staff
[03:20:44] <Ten> I was it
[03:20:54] <Ten> when I finished counting to ten, everyone was gone
#338
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[22:23:12] <Carlisle> Hmm. My best man speech is clocking in at 5 minutes 10 seconds. I think I need to trim some of it.
[22:23:17] <Carlisle> Or speed up the delivery.
[22:31:58] <Twelve> just remove every single pause
[22:32:44] <Carlisle> But those are the spots I breathe.
[22:33:18] <Twelve> ugh
[22:33:27] <Twelve> just do it like they do in those high school debate teams
[22:33:34] <Twelve> just one hickup and done
[22:33:49] <Carlisle> What, be socially awkward and a minority?
[22:33:53] <Carlisle> oh
#98
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[05:02:41] <blackhole> why do i know how to spell cthulhu and not jirafee?
#426
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[01:20:24] <.selatos> so weird
[01:20:26] <.selatos> all of you
[01:20:45] <@Loki> NAME ONE TIME
[01:21:03] <@Loki> my arms feel like someone is blowing on them with their mouth open
#8
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[17:27:06] <Phryss> Oh!
[17:27:07] <Phryss> Keir!
[17:27:15] <Phryss> I saw a girl today that reminded me of you.
[17:27:20] <Keir|NEW-GNS|Crap> !
[17:27:26] <Phryss> She had these ice packs on her shoulders
[17:27:32] <Keir|NEW-GNS|Crap> ^.-
[17:27:42] <Phryss> And they were being held in place by, like, saran wrap.
[17:27:49] <Keir|NEW-GNS|Crap> ...
[17:28:08] <Phryss> And the saran wrap wrapped tightly around her chest so her boobs were all squashed and invisible.
[17:28:15] <Phryss> The end.
#29
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[19:03:30] <blackhole> i heard so many wonderful stories about everywhere-butspain conn
[19:03:46] <blackhole> buttspain
[19:03:52] <blackhole> ah nm hehe
#43
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[00:03:00] <Maw|BUSY-BRB> The other day even in southern Alberta there are hardly any I think I saw 5 two days ago... and -40 for 2 weeks is not "cool" -20 is cool :P
[00:04:02] <Cherokee> Your choice in structuring that sentence leads me to make the preliminary diagnosis that you've recently suffered a stroke.
#44
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[03:17:23] <Light> That's pretty much my favorite part of SWC. Something completely insignificant and random occurs and e-people start psychologically profiling you.
[03:17:46] <Pozz> it's phrases like that that get you branded a corpse-banger
[03:17:48] <Sleek> yeah, i agree with the rapist
#382
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[23:49:21] <Kivan_Hamner> Twas the night before Christmas and all throughout the house
[23:49:29] <Kivan_Hamner> the AC was blowing, cause I live in the South
#440
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<blackhole> damn it. i got drunk yesterday and i apparently got a job
#212
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<blackhole> good. cat's back, i can poop again
<Squall_Chitose> was he hogging the litter box?
#55
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[11:43:21] * Riad_Sertage (~chatzilla@SWC-IRC.113BB7FF48F335.SWC) has joined #Help
[11:45:35] <Riad_Sertage> I never see any chatting is this a coinsidence or do you have to do something special to view the chat?
[11:47:19] <Riad_Sertage> Wait, If I can't see the chat Ican't see your answers... crap
[11:48:57] * Riad_Sertage (~chatzilla@SWC-IRC.113BB7FF48F335.SWC) Quit (Quit: ChatZilla 0.9.85 [Firefox 3.5.2/20090729225027])
#88
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[00:11] <Asa> pretty sure my in character daddy is dead
[00:11] <@JohnnyFox> Luke thought the same thing.
#407
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[19:18:02] <Loki> home is where you fully understand how the shower works
[19:20:54] <Kez> home is where everyone vacates because you don't properly shower and bathe yourself
[19:21:17] <Loki> That's most rooms, isn't it? Or do I just live everywhere
[19:22:03] <Kez> You may be homeless.
#9
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[16:16:08] <Keir> Post-vasectomy pain syndrome. This is a very rare condition (approximately 1 in 10,000) where you get some dropping of the testicles after surgery (a few millimeters not meters) and an associated chronic pain, like someone continually pulling on your testicles. If this happens your days of boxers shorts are over and you will need good, supportive underwear.
[16:16:09] <Keir> hot
[16:16:50] <Phryss> I like the second parenthetical.
[16:17:05] <Phryss> As though someone would expect his testicles to drop a number of meters.
[16:17:49] <Phryss> "Oh, don't mind that. My scrotum just drags along the floor behind me since my vasectomy. Sometimes I trip over it. >: /"
#106
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[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> if I had a nickel for everytime Ten tried to get me to talk about my penis, I'd have like a buck twenty
[16:09] <.Syn> That's oddly specific
[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> you don't keep track?
[16:09] <Pozz_Umgee> I'm keeping it in my online rape journal
#116
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[21:45:59] * Castur (elm@swc-irc.6jd.9ga.crg6t2.IP) has joined #swc-members
[21:46:09] <Castur> Hey cuties
[21:46:18] * Torryn makes out with Casturs leg
[21:46:27] * Var makes out with Castur
[21:46:43] <Koras> Get a room
[21:46:46] * Torryn bets Castur feels lucky
[21:47:03] <Castur> Yeah I wasn't really expecting that kind of response to be completely honest.
#128
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[21:44:09] <Cherokee> james bond beat abraham lincoln at the box office
[21:44:22] <Cherokee> boy it was a bad week for republicans all around
--
[22:39:59] <Cherokee> steven speilberg's Lincoln is in theaters now
[22:40:06] <Cherokee> traditionally, not a good place for him
#186
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<DA> haha pornhub tweeted "Don't try and upload the superbowl game, we don't allow rape"
<Azarin> Ahahahaha
<@Superman> haha
<Squall_Chitose> I'm disturbed that you follow pornhub on twitter, Deric.
<Squall_Chitose> Disturbed, but not surprised.
#12
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[19:34:58] <Mr_Tel> I'll even dip my balls in marinara sauce just so those bastards can have a taste of home while they're at it!
[19:35:19] <Asa> ...
[19:36:03] <Mr_Tel> c'mon guess what movie that's from!
[19:37:51] <Shado> The Papa John's training video?
#79
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<Jacob_Jansen> Anyone up to the task of writing up some IU history for me?
<King_Tylger> One day Vodo was like "Ohai, Hapes. SSD for your loyalty." Hapes goes "Lolz, k." Then other people thought were like "Free shit!" and joined. The End.
#113
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[01:35:25] <G`no> If the days comes when we all go to prison for downloading music 'illegally', I hope they seperate us by genre.
[02:22:59] <G`no> The first two guys thought SUperman was a bird or a plane... why the heck were they excited?
[02:48:48] <G`no> I;m going to district 9 and 3 quarters.
[16:49:25] <G`no> If you took all the Twilight fans and laid them end to end around the equator, a lot of them would drown, get run over, or eaten by lions, so it's a really good idea.
[17:45:39] <G`no> Whenever a bird craps on my car, I eat a plate of scrambled eggs on my porch to let them know what I'm capable of.
[21:59:04] <G`no> I hate it when I'm singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong
[00:06:37] <G`no> If you take a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back?
[00:06:43] <G`no> I NEED AN ANSWER MUCH FASTER!!!
[20:01:13] <G`no> i can't wait to go back to england and open a time capsule i buried when i was 10
[20:01:25] <G`no> i wanna see how big my puppy got
[20:13:30] <G`no> Ugh, I hate bragging about my financial status, but I have to say, my credit card company keeps calling me to tell me my balance is outstanding!
#118
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[22:42:21] <Cherokee> pink cotton candy
[22:42:27] <Cherokee> yes , i ate you all first
[22:42:30] <Cherokee> you disappoint me
[22:42:33] <Cherokee> blue is way better
[22:42:36] <Cherokee> blue cotton candy
[22:42:40] <Cherokee> i saved you for last
[22:42:57] <Cherokee> lets take our time , and go slow... i know you'll make the enjoyment so much sweeter for me
[22:45:44] * Cherokee turns down the lights
[22:45:56] * Cherokee snuggles bag close
[22:46:39] * Cherokee reaches hand into the opening and teases a soft fluffy piece of cloudy heaven free and puts it in his mouth to let it dissolve into blissful sweetness

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